Rex Parker Does the NYT Crossword Puzzle

Constructor:Tom McCoy

Relative difficulty:Easy-Medium

THEME:"One By One"— I don't really understand how the title relates, but the theme is two letters in one square, functioning as sequential letters in a word, in the Down, and as "[letter] AND [letter]" in the Across:

Theme answers:

B & O RAILROAD / ELBOWS
R & B ALBUM / MOTOR BIKES
GETS A LITTLE R & R / NOT TO WORRY
Q & A SESSION / QATAR
PEANUT M & MS / LEMMA (hardest one)
S & P FIVE HUNDRED (uh, "500," I think)
TEXAS A & M / STREAMLINE
A & W ROOT BEER / HAWKS

Word of the Day:la Grande Jatte(49D: Surrounder of la Grande Jatte = SEINE) —

The Ile de la Jatte or Île de la Grande Jatte is an island in France, in the river Seine, at the very gates of Paris, in the communes of Neuilly-sur-Seine and Levallois, Hauts-de-Seine. It is 7 km distant (in a straight line) from the towers of Notre Dame and 3 km from the Etoile. It has about 4,000 inhabitants and is nearly 2 km long and nearly 200 m wide at its widest point. Its name translates as "Island of the Bowl" or "Island of the Big Bowl". // It is best known as the setting for Georges Seurat's pointillist oil painting, Un Dimanche après-midi à l'Île de la Grande Jatte (A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte) (1884-6 and 1889) and also for the Stephen Sondheim musical, Sunday in the Park with George. (wikipedia)

• • •

Mixed bag. The theme feels old, and isn't terribly interesting. Not inherently, anyway. Some of the theme answers / intersections, though, are pretty inventive and colorful. I liked discovering QATAR, as I knew that they were the host country for World Cup 2022, but they didn't fit, so I got a little miffed, then doubted my own knowledge, *then* remembered the theme. Also, despite much flailing, despite its being the very last thing I entered in the grid, I liked finding PEANUT M&Ms. I can't say I *liked* finding LEMMA, as it's not a terribly likeable word, but I did appreciate the toughness there. Mostly, today, toughness was lacking. There are some nice longer answers, so I was in no way bored or put off by this. Conceptually it just felt a bit ho-hum, and there was more irksome fill than I can comfortably abide on a Sunday. OPEN ON can *&%$ off, IN A TUB needs to be drowned and eliminated from all wordlists, UNUSE hurts just to look at, and SMALLA is acceptable only as a colloquial form of "smaller" (and no, not even then). Some words were never meant to be pluralized; namely, PEYOTES and KEROSENES. Unfortunate, those. Further, I never met a [Giggle syllable] I liked. GET 'EM out of my grids. Please. Seriously. STOP IT.

Got the theme early because, well, there it is, a theme square, way up in the NW corner. Tried ELAN, then pulled it, then flailed around, then put ELAN back, and finally realized "BO" had to go in one square. With some crosses, got B&O RAILROAD, and that was that: theme, unlocked. One of the weirder things about this solve was my having so much trouble with 85A: Footnote material. I'm familiar with what goes in footnotes. My dissertation had scores of them. Naturally, I went looking for an answer that had something, anything, specifically to do with footnotes. But after getting 5/6 of the crosses and ending up with -ETAIL, I had to concede that the answer was DETAIL. You put ... DETAILs in footnotes. Apparently. Unless of course your DETAILs are worth reading, in which case they are in the body of your work, so ... I hate this clue/answer pairing on professional grounds.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Hi, Crossworld! It's another Annabel Monday and I am EXTRA TIRED because my sophomore year just started last Thursday! But not too tired to write up the puzzle. :)

Constructor: Tracy Gray

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME: JEANS— The beginning of every theme answer is a style of jeans.

Theme answers:

BAGGY EYES (17A: Facial sign of sleep deprivation)
SKINNY DIP (26A: Bathe in the buff)
LOW RISE BUILDING (41A: It has only a few stories)
FLARE GUNS (51A: Distress signal producers)
CUT-OFF SAW (66A: Tool for severing a steel cable, maybe)
JEANS (58D: Article of apparel with styles found at the starts of 17-, 26-, 41-, 51- and 66-Across)

Word of the Day: S STAR (55A: Celestial cool red giant) —

An S-type star (or just S star) is a cool giant with approximately equal quantities of carbon and oxygen in its atmosphere. The class was originally defined in 1922 by Paul Merrill for stars with unusual absorption lines and molecular bands now known to be due to s-process elements. The bands of zirconium monoxide (ZrO) are a defining feature of the S stars.
The carbon stars have more carbon than oxygen in their atmospheres. In most stars, such as class M giants, the atmosphere is richer in oxygen than carbon and they are referred to as oxygen-rich stars. S-type stars are intermediate between carbon stars and normal giants. They can be grouped into two classes: intrinsic S stars, which owe their spectra toconvection of fusion products and s-process elements to the surface; and extrinsic S stars, which are formed through mass transfer in a binary system.
The intrinsic S-type stars are on the most luminous portion of the asymptotic giant branch, a stage of their lives lasting less than a million years. Many are long period variable stars. The extrinsic S stars are less luminous and longer-lived, often smaller-amplitude semiregular or irregular variables. S stars are relatively rare, with intrinsic S stars forming less than 10% of asymptotic giant branch stars of comparable luminosity, while extrinsic S stars form an even smaller proportion of all red giants.

• • •
(Wikipedia)
(when I first saw this I definitely read it as "sstar," like how a snake would pronounce "star")

Poorly advised tweenage one-hit-wonders aside, this puzzle was awesome because I seriously love jeans. I'm pretty sure at least half of my wardrobe at this point in my life is denim. Most of them are SKINNY, but I think I have a pair or two of FLARE jeans, and CUTOFF shorts. I'm surprised "distressed" and "high-waisted" didn't make it into the puzzle, but hey, I guess you have to draw the A-line somewhere. (I know A-line dresses have nothing to do with jeans but I really wanted to work a fashion pun in there somewhere! Still not entirely sure what an A-line dress is though.)

The rest of the puzzle was pretty cool too, but not as cool as jeans. I do have to dock an imaginary point for using "apparel" in two different clues, and another imaginary point for having all those sports clues but no musical theater clues; IWOuld have liked that better. Also, is the saying really "UP AND AT IT"? I always thought it was "UP AND AT 'EM." Oh well.

Despite getting stuck in a couple places, though, this one was really fast for me. It usually takes me about half an hour to do the puzzle, but this time it only took 14 minutes. I wonder whether I've just been reviewing particularly easy puzzles lately or if I'm actually getting good at this? :0 Either way, Rex better watch out, because if this keeps up I'll be good enough to beat his time on a puzzle!*

Bullets:

ICE (20A: Decorate, as in a cake)— I just thought it was cool that the constructor didn't go with the obvious choice here by talking about ice floes or something. The only downside is that now I am hungry for cake!!!

ENSUITE (22A: Connected, as a bath to a bedroom) — Sooooo, since I'm a cool sophomore now, I get to live in a suite with two of my friends. We have a bathroom EN SUITE, as you might expect. However, there is no shower, and while there is a bathtub, it did not come with a bath plug. I assume we're supposed to bathe by sticking our heads under the faucet. (I mean, it doesn't matter that much, there's a bathroom down the hall, but. Why.)
SLATE (19A: Roof material) — Another clue I'm grateful for; you would think they would just use the name of the magazine. Also, did anyone else have TILES here for like a million years? Because I did.
LANCE (52D: Jouster's weapon)— Hey, did anyone know Maryland (my home state)'s official state sport is jousting? Isn't that so weird/cool??? We always used to watch it at the Renaissance Faire when I was little. Good stuff.

And, SCENE! Have a good month, and happy Labor Day, and all that.

Signed, Annabel Thompson, tired college sophomore.

*This is probably not going to happen.

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Timothy Polin

Relative difficulty:Easy-Medium

THEME: phrases of resignation— five where "resignation" means "acceptance" (all clued [Phrase of resignation]) and one where "resignation" means "quitting" (clued [Literal phrase of resignation]):

Theme answers:

THEM'S / THE BREAKS
AND SO IT GOES
WIN SOME, LOSE SOME
QUE SERA SERA
THAT'S LIFE
I QUIT

Word of the Day:AHL(58A: Development rink org.) —

The American Hockey League (AHL) is a 30-team professional ice hockey league based in the United States and Canada that serves as the primary developmental league for the National Hockey League (NHL). Since the 2010–11 season, every team in the league has an affiliation agreement with an NHL team; before then, one or two NHL teams would not have an AHL affiliate and so assigned players to AHL teams affiliated with other NHL teams. Twenty-seven AHL teams are located in the United States and the remaining three are in Canada. The league offices are located in Springfield, Massachusetts, and its current president is David Andrews. // The annual playoff champion is awarded the Calder Cup, named for Frank Calder, the first President (1917–1943) of the NHL. The reigning champions are the Lake Erie Monsters (since renamed as Cleveland Monsters). (wikipedia)

• • •

I thought this theme was going to be something semi-cool about answers "breaking" across black squares (see THEM'S / THE BREAKS) but then it just turned into a bunch of boring phrases with a corny-clever finale. Throw in the very below-average quality of the fill, and you get a semi-characteristically disappointing Tuesday. Seriously, look at the grid. Outside of the theme, there is NoThing of interest. It's all the fill from ye olde crossword attic, except perhaps EVITE (56D: Paperless party summons) and HATER (71A: Envious critic, in modern lingo), which can hardly be considered good. By comparison, Liz Gorski's most recent Crossword Nation puzzle (which comes out every Tuesday, and is roughly NYT-Tuesday difficulty level) is a witty, clean delight. Her puzzles are as good or better than NYT Tuesdays, most weeks. I SAY subscribe, or give a gift subscription to some beginner or easy-puzzles-only person you know.

Bullets:

69A: Flightless South American bird (RHEA)— also the name of shoulda-been-Emmy-nominated actress RHEA Seehorn ("Better Call Saul"); also the name of Casper Gutman's daughter in The Maltese Falcon (the novel—they (wisely) cut her from the movie)
5D: Former celebrity (EX-STAR)— I don't believe this is a thing. Googles very, very badly.
41D: Frolicking mammals (OTTERS)— "Mammals"? Soooo many mammals frolic! And yet I knew instantly this was OTTERS, as "frolicking" is their signature (crossword clue) move.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Kary Haddad

Relative difficulty:Easy (very)

THEME: I CAN'T COOK (60A: Explanation one might give for following the directions of 18-, 24-, 39- and 47-Across)— answers are easy-to-fix foodstuffs, clues are [cooking instructions]

Theme answers:

HOT POCKET (18A: [Place in crisping sleeve; microwave fo 2 minutes])
RAMEN NOODLES (24A: [Boil contents for 3 minutes; stir in seasoning packet])
LEFTOVER CHINESE (39A: [Put yesterday's General Tso's in microwave; heat for 2 minutes])
MAC AND CHEESE (47A: [Boil contents for 8-10 minutes; drain; add butter; stir in bright orange powder])

Word of the Day:ALT-right(69A:___-right (modern conservative movement)) —

The alt-right is a segment of right-wing ideologies presented as an alternative to mainstream conservatism in the United States. It has been described as a movement unified by support for Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump, as well as by opposition to multiculturalism and immigration. // The alt-right has no official ideology, although various sources have said that it is associated with white nationalism, white supremacism, antisemitism, right-wing populism, nativism, and the neoreactionary movement. // The alt-right has been said to be a largely online movement with Internet memes widely used to advance or express its beliefs, often on websites such as 4chan. (wikipedia)

• • •

I like this. I like this revealer. It's awkwardly straightforward and not-at-all-corny, so I'll take it. The instructions-as-clues bit is pretty clever too. Sure, LEFTOVER CHINESE is an outlier since its "cooking instructions" are just reheating instructions and don't come on a box / bag, but I still think it fits nicely with the basic idea. Fill on this one is pretty clean overall, if not ... let's say, sizzling. There's a good dose of modern stuff in the grid, like HBOGO and SIA and Kendrick LAMAR and EDM (which I always forget is a thing). Despite the fact that the grid breaks down a bit in and around the revealer, with abbr. on top of abbr. on top of prefix all covering a revealer that's kind of tricky to parse—despite all that, I crushed this one in something just north of an average Monday time (i.e. just north of 3). Once again, gimme-ing 1-Across propelled me to a fast solve (knocked out the first five Downs in order, no problem). I am not a fan of ON LIVE :( and I don't have a ton of love for BETIDE, but all told this was solid, strangely funny work.

I'd probably steer around the contemporary white nationalist / antisemitic political movement if I were cluing ALT, but that's just me. As someone I know just pointed out to me, you do have CSA in there, so it's not like movements with disgusting beliefs are forbidden. Still, CSA is bygone, whereas the ALT-right might take the White House. Am I offended by ALT-right's being in the puzzle? Uh, no. It's just ... f*&% them, everything about them, and every little thing that mainstreams and normalizes them. . . Yes. That's good. I feel better now. Put them in the puzzle, fine, but make the clue more accurate. Maybe crossreference with MESS and/or MORON and/or ODOR and/or OOZE? So many options. Be creative.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Joanne Sullivan

Relative difficulty:Easy

THEME: black squares— five of them; all answers leading into or flowing from them pick up the word "black"...

Theme answers:

COAL BLACK, BLACKFEET, BLACKSHIRT
JACK BLACK, BLACKTOP, LAMPBLACK, "BLACK VELVET"
"MEET JOE BLACK," BLACK PANTHER, "PAINT IT BLACK," BLACKMAILERS
EYE BLACK, BLACK BEAN, THE NEW BLACK, BLACK ARTS
SHOEBLACK, IN THE BLACK, BLACKLIST

Word of the Day:ARAM(26D: Biblical region from which the name of a language is derived) —

ancient Syria —its Hebrew name (M-W)

• • •

I've seen this exact theme done before, and I've seen the type multiple times. There is nothing special or outstanding about this incarnation. It's adequate. It's been done. "The Best Crossword in the World"'s marquee puzzle (Thursday!) should be better than this, or at least more original than this. This theme is pretty dense, I'll give it that. But once you get the gimmick (and I got it early—not tough), then there's not much to do but find the BLACK stuff. Shrug. Something like this needs value added. Some raison d'etre. There's nothing clever happening here. It's like a constructing exercise rather than an artfully-conceived crossword. I don't have much to say about it. There it is.

THE NEW BLACK is a partial, so I don't care how much you like that show, that answer is not good. I had most trouble with BLACKMAILERS, mostly because it went through ARAM (?) and MCCRAE (?) (22D: "In Flanders Fields" poet John). The "E" in ENV ended up being oddly hard too (46A: It might have a street name: Abbr.). But that was the one sticking point in an otherwise phenomenally easy puzzle. Knowing the theme helps you fill in huge chunks of this thing with very little effort. I did have SKIRTS instead of SKATES for a bit (3D: Carefully avoids, with "around")—that likely cost me valuable seconds, but no other problems of note arose. 1-Across gimme *again* signaled superfast solve. Gonna go watch tennis now. Just watched Serena Williams beat Simona HALEP (great player, great crossword potential). Now to see how DEL POTRO (whose name also has great grid possibilities) is faring against Stan WAWRINKA (use only in case of themeless).

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Kristian House

Relative difficulty:Challenging

THEME: THEME— DESCRIPTION

Word of the Day:PELISSE(40A: Fur-lined cloak) —

A pelisse was originally a short fur lined or fur trimmed jacket that was usually worn hanging loose over the left shoulder of hussar light cavalry soldiers, ostensibly to prevent sword cuts. The name was also applied to a fashionable style of woman's coat worn in the early 19th century. (wikipedia)

• • •

Unpleasantly tough. I really hate it when Friday and Saturday aren't accurately placed. I realize this is an idiosyncratic peeve, but when Fridays are grinds and / or Saturdays are a snap, I kinda want my money back. It wasn't just the toughness today that irked me a bit. It was the cheapness of the toughness. Like ... GAZILLION. I mean, GAJILLION and BAJILLION and BAZILLION all seem like [Really huge (fake) number]s. And the J/Z thing keeps the ridiculous / no-one-says-that ZITCOM very, very hidden (3D: Adolescent program, slangily) (see also the REC / REW problem, which is also a ZITCOM cross). And then there's the archaism of PELISSE. What the hell? And it's not just a word in the puzzle—it's *the* word (well, one of two) that can get you into that NE corner. Literally no letter of PELISSE was gettable to me without crosses, despite the fact that it feels like a medieval word and I have some, uh, background in medievalism (it's actually a 19c. fashion, so I'm off the hook there, I guess). PELISSE is a Saturday word, if it's anything.

SPECS are a [Bridge pair, briefly?] how? Your nose? SPECtacleS on the bridge of your nose? Ugh. I got SPECS and thought of specifications, blueprints, architecture, who knows? None of this cluing stuff was amusing to me. Also, LENO is not "known for his garage." He's "known for" occupying a huge amount of time between Carson and Fallon (with that weird Conan hiccup in there somewhere). I get that he had some show with a garage because he collects cars blah blah blah. But he is not "known for" that. Moving on: No idea what a POPPET is. Own "Popeye" comics and didn't know SEA HAG. You spell HOMIES how? Also, we're still doing HOMIES? OK.

There were parts I enjoyed. In general, the banks of longer answers in the corners were good. Acceptable-to-good. But OUIDA is never good (61A: "A Dog of Flanders" author) and INO is never good (4D: Goddess who saved Odysseus) and ERGOT AIOLI, hoo boy, you do Not want any of that with your calamari. Nasty. Normally a couple of UPs in a puzzle don't bug me, but today, possibly because they're both short and near each other (DO UP / GAS UP), I was indeed bugged.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Peter Wentz

Relative difficulty:Medium (or Easy, or who knows)

THEME: none

Word of the Day:DOGCART(38D: Light carriage) —

noun
noun: dog cart; plural noun: dog carts; noun: dogcart; plural noun: dogcarts; noun: dog-cart; plural noun: dog-carts
a two-wheeled horse-drawn cart, with cross seats back to back, originally incorporating a box under the seat for sportsmen's dogs. (wikipedia)

• • •

Wow, if I don't get 1-Across right off the bat, I am in trouble. Today, no hope there, or at PHNOM PENH (15A: Capital where "hello" is pronounced "johm riab sua") (that's ... Khmer?) or ALEX ROCCO(17A: He played Moe Greene in "The Godfather") (seen movie many times, never knew actor's name) or FMRI (?), so NW was a waste. Sadly, my first answer was ICE IN (20A: Block at an airport, perhaps). I almost feel guilty about that, since no human would ever guess that naturally. That's pure crossword instinct. Then EPOCH and HIVE and then there was a moment of whoooosh and I GLIDEd right down into the SE, picking up the very easy NE along the way. PALMOLIVE (60A: Brand once pitched with the slogan "You're soaking in it") was the absolute gimme I *wish* I'd had at 1-Across. Anyway, I backed my way back into the NW and took it down and then circled around and brought my solving to a point—the grid all filled in except the SE. Narrow access point, but I figure, I got this. I figured very, very wrong. Here's what my grid looked like before the freefall.

Can you see the wrong answer, the wrong square, that strangled me? It's the "M" in (wrong) MOHLER. Faucet names? Ugh. I apparently conflated KOHLER and MOEN. And let me tell you, "M" looks just fine there, until you can't make any answer work in the across (47A: Batting a thousand, say). I tried ON A SCREAM once, desperately. I also could not remember SKEE-LO (48D: Rapper with the 1995 hit "I Wish") despite being able to picture him and the music video and being able to sing the chorus of the song (roughly). I had COOLIO in my head, and I knew that was way wrong, but ... just stuck. Also, the GECKO is a mascot, not a "symbol" (argh). I managed to get DIM and RIALS (which Of Course ended up being RIELS). But otherwise I was in freefall for minutes. DOG CART??? TAROT from *that* clue (64A: The Devil, e.g.). I finally finally finally figured out that "Y's" were NEXT .... TO LAST. And that did it. Well, until I got DOG CART / ON A STREAM and wondered WTF. Both seemed off. But just one. Just one. Puzzle seems fine. I usually groove on Wentz puzzles a lot more than I did on this one, but I have no complaints. People seem to be finding this one relatively easy. I just had a slow start and a very, very bad ending.

It's weird, though, now that I think of it. My time was only a little north of my normal Saturday time. I think because so much of it was easy, the hard parts felt devastating. Also, I'm used to being right in step with Wentz puzzles, and today ... it's like you don't even know me, Pete!

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Ned White and George Barany

Relative difficulty:Easy

THEME:Sack Time— it's about beds, and there's a vaguely bed-shaped black-square element in the middle of the grid:

Theme answers:

COVER STORY (22A: Magazine's lead)
PILLOW TALK (24A: Rock Hudson/Doris Day romantic comedy)
BLANKET STATEMENT (32A: There are no ifs, ands or buts about it)
SLEEP OVER (49A: Pajama party)
SAW LOGS (64A: Snore loudly)
MONSTER (70A: What a child may think is under the [puzzle's central image])
DUST BUNNY (86A: What a parent may thin is under the [puzzle's central image])
CAME DOWN IN SHEETS (101A: Rained cats and dogs)
MESSAGE PAD (115A: Item on a telephone stand)
AND SO TO BED (118A: Line at the end of a day's diary)

Word of the Day:New Mexico's SANDIA National Laboratories(85D) —

The Sandia National Laboratories, managed and operated by the Sandia Corporation (a wholly owned subsidiary of Lockheed Martin), are two major United States Department of Energy research and development national laboratories. // Their primary mission is to develop, engineer, and test the non-nuclear components of nuclear weapons. The primary campus is located on Kirtland Air Force Base in Albuquerque, New Mexico and the other is in Livermore, California, next to Lawrence Livermore National Laboratory. Sandia is a National Nuclear Security Administration laboratory. (wikipedia)

• • •

There's a cuteness to this idea, particularly the MONSTER under the bed. Actually, that's my favorite part. The rest of it, however, has a ton of problems. First, theme answers both are and are not about beds; this kind of inconsistency is irksome. If you're going to bury your bed words in non-bed answers (and that's the ideal) then do it all the way. PAD, SHEET, COVER, BLANKETS ...are all used in non-bed contexts, but the PILLOW in PILLOW TALK is not a non-bed pillow. I can give a little more leeway to the answers that are proximate to the [bed] image, but the bed-part answers, no. Clunk. Further, the clue on DUST BUNNY does not ring true. No "parent""may think" there's a DUST BUNNY under the bed. That is not a thing that a parent does. You might find one there, sure, but you don't *imagine* the bunny. You clean under the bed. The bunny itself is not something you think on, not nearly the way a kid thinks on the potential MONSTER. Attempt at parallel cluing there rings totally false. PAD doesn't seem that beddy to me, though I guess a *mattress* PAD is indeed often found there. AND SO TO BED is nobody's diary entry but Pepys', so that clue also rings false. Mostly, there is just too much bed stuff going on. Stuff above the bed does not relate to the below-the-bed-stuff, so thematically this feels like not clearly conceptualized enough. The cool central gag is dwarfed by a bunch of incidental, only vaguely bed/sleep-related stuff. Deadens impact of the "joke." Also, what is up with that title ("Sack Time")? What is ... that? A pun? That is not a phrase. No one says "sack time." If you google it in quotation marks, you will get a crossword blog among your first hits, so ... ?

Not thrilled with non-theme Across answers as long as or even dwarfing themers. Distracting. On top of that, TATE MUSEUM is not exactly a thing. It's the TATE GALLERY or the TATE MODERN. There are many Tate museums, but TATE MUSEUM is ... imprecise. Let's keep going, this time, to full-on inaccuracy: 1D: Big feature of Popeye, informally (BICEP). You'd think my complaint would be about BICEP (not a word), and yeah, it's icky, but the real problem is with the clue, in that it's factually incorrect. And people noticed. Right away:

I can't wait for the retraction on that one. Classic. Moving on, the fill had nice moments (e.g. PASTICHE, ADD TO THE MIX, WISEACRE), but too many ugh-ish moments. NW sets the tone with BICEP ASONE EIRE RTS ENURE (lots of mediocre stuff in small space), and then it goes on from there. VIVACE ANODE LST; CIO ICEE OKRAS plural!; ULE ALETA!! (a cross that broke at least one person I know). It's a grid w/ lots of short answers, and we get pummeled with them. Finally, there's the very terrible cross, the close-to-textbook Natick, of SCARNE / SANDIA (93A: "___ on Cards," classic 1949 book / 85D: New Mexico's ___ National Laboratories). Yeesh. SANDIA???? I have vaguely heard of SCARNE, but SANDIA? No. Crossing proper nouns like this, at a fairly unguessable letter... how do you see this and not go "Nope, back to the drawing board"? I guessed correctly; others won't. Here's my solution: change SANDIA (!?!) to SANDRA and clue R-NE in relation to a U.S. Senator of note.

I'll take R-NE over IN E any day. IN E is a suffix posing as a short phrase. Not a fan. Stop falling back on the dull tried-and-true stuff. Be inventive! And above all, for pete's sake, police your Naticks.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Victor Fleming and Andrea Carla Michaels

Relative difficulty:Normal Monday, maybe slightly easier than normal (so ... Easy-Medium?)

THEME: homophonic verb phrases—

Theme answers:

POLLS POLES (17A: Asks Warsaw residents their opinions?)
HEALS HEELS (11D: Cures the backs of feet?)
SELLS CELLS (27D: Finds buyers for smartphones?)
ADDS ADS (39A: Increases the number of commercials?)
PARES PEARS (62A: Peels some fruit?)

Word of the Day:MAUD Adams(24D: Bond girl Adams) —

Maud Solveig Christina Wikström (born 12 February 1945), known professionally as Maud Adams, is a Swedish actress, known for her roles as two different Bond girls: in The Man with the Golden Gun (1974), and as the eponymous character in Octopussy (1983) as well as making a brief uncredited appearance in A View to a Kill (1985) . (wikipedia)

• • •

Sincerely, objectively, this is not good. This is far below the quality of puzzle the NYT should be putting out on a regular basis. Yes, even on Monday. Not only is the theme stale and corny, the fill is mediocre to bad in a way that shouldn't be acceptable any more, especially in an easy Monday puzzle. LOOIE RRS ASSN PEDI AND EMDASH ISDUE MAH AMIS ESAI UNPEG SACS ERTE ASIS SSGT ... for starters. It's an avalanche of the common, awkward, tedious. Virtually all clues are oriented toward some time roughly 30-50 years ago. I can't believe the NYT needs Mondays this badly. S.O.S.

[29D: Bette who won a Golden Globe Award for "Gypsy"]

But back to the theme—come on. If this is a theme ... you can make another just like it without much effort. SEARS SEERS, BARES BEARS, HAULS HALLS (Transports cough drops?) etc. And the themers we get today aren't even wacky. They do not even have the questionable virtue of Wackiness. I mean POLLS POLES, as clued, Does Not Require The "?" That Is Attached To It. It's literal. It's not even an unimaginable cuckoo kind of a thing. Just a thing. That rhymes. Homophones. Again, ugh. No real imagination here. As for solving problems, there were none except at the very end, when I had [Baby back ribs source] as PIT (as in "barbecue PIT"). I stood outside a barbecue joint while drinking a vanilla malt earlier today, so that may have had something to do with the error.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Stanley Newman

Relative difficulty:Medium-Challenging to Challenging (*for a Tuesday*)

THEME:two Qs— three theme answers, each with 2 Qs

Theme answers:

QUINQUAGENARIAN (17A: Person between 50 and 59)
"SHAQ ATTAQ" (40A: O'Neal's memoir of his N.B.A. rookie year)
QUEBEC NORDIQUES (65A: N.H.L. team that became the Colorado Avalanche)

Word of the Day:"SHAQ ATTAQ"—

• • •

Well that was weird. Not much of a theme, but the answers are unusual enough that it's at least interesting (more than I can say for most Tuesdays). QUINQUAGENARIAN is not common (my blogging software is giving it an angry red underline right now) and "SHAQ ATTAQ" is downright obscure. I've never heard of it, which is at least a little weird. I mean, I've heard of "Kazaam." And I've heard of "Hack-a-Shaq," which is sincerely what I thought this was for a little bit. HAQQ-A-SHAQ! Difficulty level also jacked up by strangely tough mash-up of several words in and around "SHAQ ATTAQ": DIBS was mildly tough (31A: Rights, informally), and the front end of CUE CARDS was hard to see for a while (38A: Orators' aids), but real Saturday-level wrench in the system was that clue on BUT (32D: Waffle introducer?). Holy moly. It's a fine clue, but it's not at all a Tuesday clue. The fact that it runs through DIBS and CUE CARDS and, perversely, "SHAQ ATTAQ," made it especially debilitating. Everything else was Tuesday-easy, but that little nexus of nastiness added significantly to my solving time.

Bullets:

5D: Davenport, e.g. (COUCH)— I'm reading Chandler right now, and there are no COUCHes in his novels. No sofas. Only davenports. Everywhere you turn.
73A: Central Florida metropolis, informally (O-TOWN)— oh, this one added to my time too. Is this really what they call OCALA?*
53A: Acknowledge as true (COP TO)— dropped REPLETE in the cross but then took it out because I figured this answer was ... NOD TO ... [cough] ... [sound of wind whistling in the trees] ... [somewhere a coyote howls] ...

Gonna go watch Sam Bee now. Later.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

*kidding

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Dan Schoenholz

Relative difficulty:Easy

THEME: PICTURE / FRAME (25A: With 36-Across, what this puzzle features, literally)— the "frame" (i.e. words around the perimeter of the grid, are all motion "pictures" that were "honored" (... in some way ...) by the ACADEMY of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences (50A: Organization that honored those referenced in the [PICTURE / FRAME], with "the"):

Theme answers:

AVATAR
JFK
REDS
SELMA
PLATOON
PATTON
RAY
TESS
GHOST
AMADEUS

Word of the Day:RENA Sofer(37D: Sofer of "General Hospital") —

Rena Sherel Sofer (born December 2, 1968) is an American actress, primarily known for her appearances in daytime television, episodic guest appearances, and made-for-television movies. In 1995, Sofer received a Daytime Emmy Award for her portrayal of Lois Cerullo in the soap opera General Hospital. (wikipedia)

• • •

This is a variation (VARIETAL?) of a well-worn theme-type (words-around-the-outside). Conceptually a bit of a mess, in that PICTURE FRAME suggests a static image, and PICTURE FRAME ACADEMY make an odd-ball assortment of central themers. I know very well that the word "frame" means something in movies too, but the phrase "PICTURE FRAME" doesn't evoke the film version of "frame." Just google it if you doubt me. Further, the whole ACADEMY angle is pretty weak. Or, rather, "honored" is weak. They all appear to be Best Picture nominees, though only "PATTON,""AMADEUS," and "PLATOON" actually won. I get that the clue for ACADEMY can't be a lot more specific than "honored" without giving the gimmick away, but it still leaves the exact nature of what the movies have in common pretty vague (I was surprised that either "GHOST" or "TESS" was actually nominated). So it's a sort of cute idea, but the theme-type is old and the overall execution is a little wobbly.

The rest of the puzzle is utterly forgettable. Fill is a little subpar, though the grid's fairly theme-dense, so I don't hold this weakness against it that much. The most memorable answer (SILENT L) is also it's most regrettable, in that it doesn't really feel completely silent, somehow, in the example provided (47A: It occurs twice in "chalk talk"), and I don't think of SILENT L as a good stand-alone answer. But then again I'm lukewarm to cold on all answers of the SILENT_ type except SILENT E, which is def a thing. Waiting to see whether AORTAS was going to be the English or Latin plural was about all the excitement to be had today. Puzzle zipped by with very little resistance, and very little in the way of entertainment. Hardest answer for me was ARGUED, as I think of [Wrangled] as meaning "herded" or otherwise "handled" (as livestock, horses, etc.). The clue is correct. I just had the wrong frame of reference. You see: exciting! There are some answers that I suppose you could consider bonus themers (FADE IN, ROLE, various actresses), but I don't. Too loosely connected to theme, too common. Good to not have any other movie titles in the puzzle besides the "frame" ones. Otherwise, the puzzle was just OK.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor:Ian Livengood

Relative difficulty:Challenging (hilariously so)

THEME:ANAGRAM THE / FIRST WORD / IN EACH CLUE—just what it says

Word of the Day:Deseret(63A: Steered, today => UTAH) —

The State of Deseret (ⁱ/ˌdɛzəˈrɛt/) was a provisional state of the United States, proposed in 1849 by settlers from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS Church) in Salt Lake City. The provisional state existed for slightly over two years and was never recognized by the United States government. The name derives from the word for "honeybee" in the Book of Mormon. (wikipedia)

• • •

More than 2x my normal Thursday time. Not really a problem in and of itself, but what I spent that time doing: ugh. Seriously, 2x ugh. Slow start, not surprisingly, but not that long into my poking around and getting nowhere, I picked up the anagram gimmick. Seeing that there were three parts to the "revealer," though, I figured there were three elements to the gimmick. There were not. There was just the one. And I had already discovered it. And the rest of the long, tedious solve was just ... anagramming. Over. And over. To what end? Just to ... the end. Considered opening an anagram tab an just plugging in first words so I wouldn't have to bother with the stupidity of it all, but decided just to gut it out. SATS are *things* that high schoolers obsess over? I resent having to anagram a word in order to get something as stupid and vague as "things.""O, CANADA" is a "strain"? Gah. And the grid is just ... instructions plus a forgettable themeless. That's what the puzzle boils down to. Solver pleasure given zero consideration here. One "aha" moment followed by a long slog to the finish line.

The fill doesn't even matter. There's nothing to say. Anagrams. The end.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Patrick Berry

Relative difficulty:Medium

THEME: none

Word of the Day:Mel ALLEN(25D: Longtime "Voice of the New York Yankees") —

Mel Allen (born Melvin Allen Israel; February 14, 1913 – June 16, 1996) was an American sportscaster, best known for his long tenure as the primary play-by-play announcer for the New York Yankees. During the peak of his career in the 1940s, 1950s and 1960s, Allen was arguably the most prominent member of his profession, his voice familiar to millions. Years after his death, he is still promoted as having been the "Voice of the New York Yankees." In his later years, he gained a second professional life as the first host of This Week in Baseball. // In perhaps the most notable moment of his distinguished career, Allen called game 7 of the 1960 World Series, in which Bill Mazeroski hit a walk-off home run to win the fall classic for the Pittsburgh Pirates. This is the only walk-off home run ever to occur in a game 7 of a World Series. (wikipedia)

• • •

Pretty typical high-quality work from Mr. Berry. Started out like a house afire in the NW (1-Across gimme in effect! 1A: Handle things (COPE)), but then encountered some pretty significant trouble trying to move through narrow passageways into other parts of the grid. Moving into SW obviously hard, given that there's just that one-square opening, and the only help you have is a terminal "S" at 28A: Feels deep sympathy (ACHES). Similar issue getting into NE—just the narrow slit of an opening, and there, a leading "S" that wasn't much help (22A: Anti-___ League (Progressive Era organization) (SALOON)). But those are mere structural issues. I had real content issues in the middle of the grid, though, where I hit a proper noun pile-up. The fact that the pile-up was dead-center meant that moving into Any portion of the grid became difficult. The overturned tractor-trailer in all of this was ALLEN (!?!?). He died 20 years ago. The name is vaguely familiar, now that I look at it, but without even "Mel" in the clue, there was no hope, none, zero, of my getting ALLEN from 25D: Longtime "Voice of the New York Yankees"; I won't be the only one for whom that is true. I think the puzzle thinks he's more famous than he is. I ended up actually knowing OLD BAILEY, FOLEY, and KING JAMES (how is this not a LeBron clue!?), but all of them were tough to pick up because of ... ALLEN.

>
Very wide-open squares were a bit of a challenge—an appropriately Friday-level challenge, it turns out. Clues were clever and tough throughout. 59A: Command that a dog shouldn't follow (STAY) was one of my favorites. 54A: One with changing needs (DIAPER BAG), also goo. My least favorite was the clue on NERDS (46D: Brainy high school clique). "Clique" my ass. This makes it sound like NERDS are some exclusive / exclusionary bunch. I guarantee you that NERDS are more than happy to nerd out with you, no matter what you look like, how much money you have, etc. You don't have to be rich to rule their world. "Clique"! Boooo! Everything about the word "clique" is non-nerd.

I was really uncertain about SWIM (50D: Thick of things, in a a manner of speaking) and had to try saying "in the SWIM" several times before moving on. Even then, it kept coming out "in the SWIM of things," and I think I meant "in the swing of things," so maybe I don't understand SWIM at all. Berry's puzzles tend to play a little out of my comfort zone in a lot of ways, and this may just be some expression I don't really know. Oh, here we go.

This makes the clue seem ... not very precise. But no matter. I got it.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor:Andrew J. Ries

Relative difficulty:Easy-Medium

THEME: none

Word of the Day:FARMERS ONLY(37A: Website for people interested in "cultivating" a relationship) —

Carrying the tagline "city folks just don't get it,"FarmersOnly.com launched with about 2,000 members, but grew to more than 100,000 users by 2010 as nonfarmers embraced the sensibility. // "You don't have to be a farmer," Miller, who's based in Cleveland, said. "You could work at a restaurant, or the feed store, but are looking for someone who has those values." (some Yahoo (appropriately) article)

• • •

The only remarkable things here are NOT GONNA LIE, which is Great, and FARMERS ONLY, which is not. I am having the most ridiculous back-and-forths right now on Twitter with FARMERS ONLY defenders, or, if not defenders, FARMERS ONLY knowers. Not only have I never heard of it, it seems like some dumb-@$$ $!^#. Just reading about it made me stupider. It's unusual, though, I'll give it that. Anyway, everything else was pretty forgettable, except the NE, which had a lively bunch of first-person exclamations: "OH MY! WHAT A DAY! I'M SO MAD!!! ... Where are my DORITOS, TORI!?" A nice corner indeed. Almost makes me not notice AMU. Almost.

[LISA / LISA and Cult Jam: "His kiss is credit in the bank of love / Never leave home without it!"]

I didn't know Philemon *or* TITUS were books (of the Bible?) so that wasn't easy. I don't like I AM being in the grid with I'M SO MAD. It's a dupe, contraction be damned. Hey, look, it's the LeBron "King James" reference I asked for yesterday! Fast service! (18D: King James, e.g.). Can't believe I'm saying this, but this puzzle coulda eased up on the sports. UCLA (clued via tennis), CAV, BUC, GATOR, ATL, STEPH, FOUL LINE; we get it, you're a sports fan. Clues were suitably tricky, and that is some bonkers trivia re: DORITOS (22A: Snack brand first produced at Disney land in the 1960s). But mostly it was shrug and ugh. More shrug. Actually, not a lot of ugh. And then some good parts. So ... an average Saturday, I guess.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Jeremy Newton

Relative difficulty:Medium

THEME:"Make a Dash For It"—dashes in the Downs, wacky dashes in the Acrosses (7 times)

Theme answers:

PUSH-UP BRA / B-LISTER PACK (32A: Troupe of lesser-known actors?)
UH-OH / PHOENIX A-Z (24A: Actor Joaquin's complete bio?)
THE PO-PO / G-RATED CHEESE (44A: Schmaltz in kids' films?)
FREE WI-FI / AMERICAN GOT HI-C (65A: An airline now serves a Minute Maid beverage?)
B-BOY / CHICKEN CO-OPS (87A: Some apartments for scaredy-cats?)
TO-DOS / MOVING A-SIDE (100A: Record half that stirs emotions?)
HA-HA / LO-CAL HERO (109A: Sandwich for a dieter?)

Word of the Day: REDFISH (35A: Reef-dwelling snapper)—

Redfish is a common name for several species of fish. It is most commonly applied to certain deep-sea rockfish in the genusSebastes, or the reef dwelling snappers in the genus Lutjanus. It is also applied to the slimeheads or roughies (family Trachichthyidae), and the alfonsinos (Berycidae). (wikipedia) (my emphasis)

• • •

This is really quite clever. It's everything the average Sunday puzzle should be. It's got a clever, original gimmick, and it's genuinely funny, especially as the "wacky-clue"-type themes go. It's also got an elegant simplicity: real dash in the Down, fake one in the Across. Some of the wacky theme answers seem like very reasonable, plausible phrases (esp. LO-CAL HERO, G-RATED CHEESE, and MOVING A-SIDE), and then some ... well, some are AMERICAN GOT HI-C, which is as absurd as they get. Something about its having a phrasing similar to "America's Got Talent" really seals the deal for me. This puzzle is proof that the Sunday puzzle doesn't have to be overly complicated, difficult, or fussy to work. You can have relatively standard 7-answer wackiness and pull it off with aplomb. Also, with a few exceptions, this grid is fairly clean and lively. Not a lot of wincing. TO YOU ISMS is kind of wincey, and, you know, there's EEN and TOPED and ESS, but it's all so minor, especially in a grid this theme-dense and enjoyable.

Got the theme—or the idea of the dash-square, anyway—early, very early, with PUSH-UP BRA. Took me a little while longer to figure out what the hell was going on with the wacky-dash Acrosses. I did not get, for far too long, that the Acrosses were real, viable answers if you remove the dash. So I was looking at B-LIST ... and then B-LISTER ... and not really understanding what had to come next. Also, seeing THE PO-PO was *really* hard. Easy to see where the wacky Acrosses are, not so easy to see where the dash-having Downs are. So 18D: Cops, in slang were THE -O---. All I could think of was THE FUZZ. Had to get one or more of those P's before I had that D'oh! moment where you remember the theme after having let it temporarily slip from your mind. STEEL GRAYS is a truly painful plural, but it's made up for, at least partially, by its symmetrical counterpart, CROP CIRCLE. Well, not the answer so much (which is fine), but the clue: 74D: Work of extraterrestrials? —not! No one says "not" like that anymore (not for 20 years), so that was a bit awkward, but I love the light-hearted vibe there. Also, I love anything that mocks magical thinking / conspiracy-theory mind-set, which is destroying civilization.

Hey, NJ residents, there is a crossword tournament in your state very soon and you should check it out. It is part of the Collingswood Book Festival, and it is being hosted by Washington Post crossword writer/editor Evan Birnholz (puzzles will be upcoming NYTs). Here's the flyer (click on it if you to embiggen it).

I have no idea where Collingswood is, but I assume a bunch of my readers live relatively nearby. So dare to attend a low-stakes tourney. You may find you like them. You'll meet other dorks like you. It's fun. Seriously.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Zhouqin Burnikel

Relative difficulty:Easy (close to record time, and on a 16-wide grid!)

THEME: HOLLYWOOD SQUARES (41A: Classic TV game show ... or what 18-, 25-, 55- and 66-Across are, in a way)— theme answers are movie titles that contain square numbers:

Theme answers:

"NINE MONTHS" (18A: 1995 Hugh Grant/Julianne Moore romantic comedy)
"THE FOUR SEASONS" (25A: 1981 Alan Alda/Carol Burnett comedy)
"SIXTEEN CANDLES" (55A: 1984 Molly Ringwald coming-of-age comedy)
"ONE FINE DAY" (66A: 1996 Michelle Pfeiffer/Goerge Clooney romantic comedy)

Word of the Day:Adolph RUPP(21A: ___ Arena, home to the Kentucky Wildcats) —

Adolph Frederick Rupp (September 2, 1901 – December 10, 1977) was one of the most successful coaches in the history of American college basketball. Rupp is ranked fourth (behind Mike Krzyzewski, Bob Knight, and Dean Smith) in total victories by a men's NCAA Division I college coach, winning 876 games in 41 years of coaching. Rupp is also second among all men's college coaches in all-time winning percentage (.822), trailing only Clair Bee. Rupp was enshrined in the Naismith Memorial Basketball Hall of Fame on April 13, 1969.

• • •

Hey, this is cute. I mean, thematically, conceptually—a great use of HOLLYWOOD SQUARES as a revealer. There are a couple of issues with the execution. First, there's the relative iconic-ness of the movies, which ranges from solid ("SIXTEEN CANDLES") to non-existent ("ONE FINE DAY"? What is that?). Is there really not a better / more familiar ONE movie out there. I mean, it's bad enough you have to subject us to the fairly execrable "NINE MONTHS"—"Nine" movies are pretty hard to come by. "District 9" uses the numeral. So I'll give you "NINE MONTHS." But you gotta give me something better in the "ONE" department. There's no reason the "ONE" has to come first. Who cares? Just get the "ONE" in there and we're good to go. If you want to do this theme Right, as opposed to just Do it, then you need the movies to be good non-marginal, and you need to move things around until you get it right. Also, ideally, the movies go in numerical order ... but that's a higher bar, for sure. Perhaps impossible. The fill was subpar today, for sure; surprisingly so. Well beneath what I expect at this point from this constructor. That west section is pretty emblematic. Total BAH-fest. BAHA-fest. AKELA-fest. AMOK/AMOI-city. Too much junk, too much mustiness.

I finished so fast that I'm just gonna focus on those places where I tripped—where I added seconds to my solve. Even at high speeds (for this one, 2:36), there's always time to be shaved.

Hiccups:

MDT (7D: Summer hrs. in Colorado)— wrote in CDT. My family lives there; I should know better.
MPEG (19D: Digital video file format)— wrote in JPEG. Dumb.
MENDS (14D: Gives a darn?)— had the -S and just blanked. Wanted only ... DARNS. Tough day with the "M" words.
AKELA (46A: Cub Scout leader named after a character in "The Jungle Book")— one of those words I know *exclusively* from crosswords, and one that I always remember as AKETA :(
"I RULE!" (56D: "Go me!") — that's not punctuated right. There must be a comma between "Go" and "me." Must. Ugh and BAH. Couldn't parse it, slowed me down.
"CAN IT!" (58D: "Zip your lip!")— had "---IT" and just had to wait on crosses.

That's it. The only other hold-up was having zero clue what the hell "ONE FINE DAY" was (movie-wise). Overall good puzzle, with some significant but not fatal wobbliness.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Tracy Bennett

Relative difficulty:Medium-Challenging (*for a Tuesday*)

THEME: NO PIECE OF CAKE (59A: What a chef might call each dessert featured in this puzzle, literally or figuratively)— desserts that are not cakes and are not (I guess) easy to make (?):

Theme answers:

ENGLISH TRIFLE (20A: Layers of sherry-soaked torte, homemade custard and fruit served chilled in a giant stem glass)
BAKED ALASKA (35A: Ice cream and sponge topped with meringue and placed in a very hot oven for a few minutes)
PLUM PUDDING (42A: Steamed-for-hours, aged-for-months concoction of treacle, brandy, fruit and spices, set afire and served at Christmas)

Word of the Day:RUCHE(15A: Strip of fabric used for trimming) —

noun
noun: ruche; plural noun: ruches
a frill or pleat of fabric as decoration on a garment or home furnishing. (google)

• • •

I see the wordplay here, but since I don't associate these desserts with difficulty (or with much of anything), the joke didn't really land, for me. I spent at least a few seconds trying to make A PIECE OF CAKE work in the revealer, if that tells you anything about how much the joke missed me. I think this is a good puzzle that just feels alien to me—me personally. I can appreciate that it would be a satisfying solve for someone even though that someone wasn't me. I've never had any of these desserts. I had no idea there was any dessert on the planet that was "aged-for-months." The fill also played out of my wheelhouse, and somewhat old, and what wasn't old ... was also alien to me (god save me from another Kardashian klue, or from having to know J-Lo's kid's name !?!?!). Sam Cooke is my kind of old. "DARE WE SAY" isn't. This is certainly cleverer and cleaner than most Tuesdays. Just not to my taste. Like Victorian furnishings—they might be as nice as can be, my eye is never gonna be happy.

Clues were tough for me today, at least in several places they were. 14A: Blade in the pen (SHIV) totally baffled me. Tried to make sense of both "blade" and "pen" and just couldn't. I had ice skates and writing implements in my head. I've heard of ruching, I think, but not a single RUCHE, so that was rough. Very hard to pick up "DARE WE SAY" from the back end (which is how I came at it), though I imagine it would've caused me some trouble from the front as well. How is an ® a sign for ™? They are different keys on my keyboard and must mean different things, right? I had ERIN for EIRE (68A: Land of Blarney) and DEALS for MEALS (53D: "Square" things, ideally) and even getting SIMP from just 66A: Fool was tough. And, as I say, EMME shmemme (61D: J.Lo's daughter with a palindromic name).

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Matthew Sewell

Relative difficulty:Medium-Challenging

THEME: SCRAMBLE THE JETS (57A: Spring into action ... or an apt directive for 17-, 23-, 36- and 49-Across)— letters "JETS" are "SCRAMBLEd" across two words in different two-word phrases:

Theme answers:

ROCKET J. SQUIRREL (17A: Flying furry friend from Frostbite Falls, formally)
METS JERSEY (23A: New York sports fan's purchase)
COURT JESTER (36A: Rigoletto, for one)
"JULES ET JIM" (49A: 1962 François Truffaut film classique)

Word of the Day:PERORATE(10D: Give a long, grandiloquent speech) —

verb
formal
verb: perorate; 3rd person present: perorates; past tense: perorated; past participle: perorated; gerund or present participle: perorating
speak at length.

"he reportedly would perorate against his colleague"
archaic
sum up and conclude a speech.

"the following innocent conclusion with which she perorates"
(google)

• • •

This theme type is old. I've never ever heard of the revealer. The fill is frequently godawful. Not sure if this is just another (in a series?) of puzzles that just live on a different planet from me, or if it's empirically bad. Scratch that. It's *definitely* not from my planet. And it's *definitely*, at the fill level, bad. Subpar is the most generous way you could describe that would have either ASIM (!?!) *or* LEK (my most hated crosswordese currency). Having both is *&%^ing ridiculous. Careless. There is absolutely no reason for LEK. You can de-LEK the grid in 10 seconds if you're a halfway decent constructor. Garbage. Honestly, though, even if I had heard of the revealer, the theme is stale, and the theme answers at best OK. METS JERSEY is total b.s. Green paint, for sure. It opens the floodgate of [Any Team's] JERSEY. I actually really like "JULES ET JIM" and its adorable Frenchness. And sure, ROCKET J. SQUIRREL is a nice answer. They are nice answers on their own. But the other answers are less impressive and again, conceptually, this thing is kind of tired.

PERORATE I barely know and LARKSPUR (11D: Buttercup family member with irregularly shaped blossoms) I don't know At All. This had something to do with my slowish time today. Having TDS instead of YDS also hurt, considering that gave me the wrong final letter in the already-stupid-and-messed-up METS JERSEY. METS JACKET!? Seems about as "good."ROOMIE is slang and clue should reflect it, but doesn't (2D: One sharing a Wi-Fi password, maybe). There's an IRENE Curie now? (32D: Nobel Prize-winning daughter of the Curies). Wow. A TONNE (TUNS?) of things in this puzzle that were just A DRAG. But the LEK decision is the one that's beyond belief. I mean ... you have to really believe in "OK, SO," which ... is bad judgment. "OK, SO" is not worth LEK. Nothing is worth LEK. LEK, be a lady ... somewhere else. I guess we can be grateful it wasn't LEU, which is Also Somehow A Currency Unit— "the basic monetary unit of Romania, equal to 100 bani." If I ever see BANI in a puzzle, I quit.

I will give a standing ovation to the ANKLET clue, though. "That's a honey of an ANKLET you're wearing, Mrs. Dietrichson..."

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Jeffrey Wechsler

Relative difficulty:Medium

THEME:puns involving foreign numbers—

Theme answers:

SEPT PIECES (17A: A number of stage items in a French play?)
DREI MARTINIS (23A: A number of cocktails in Berlin?)
SECHS THERAPISTS (37A: A number of Freudians in Freiburg)
TRES ELEMENTS (46A: A number of chemical rarities in Madrid?)
HUIT FIELDS (57A: A number of grain-producing sites in Normandy?)

Word of the Day:Palazzo FARNESE(31A: Palazzo ___, architectural gem of the Renaissance) —

Palazzo Farnese (Italian pronunciation: [paˈladdso farˈneːze; -eːse]) is one of the most important High Renaissance palaces in Rome. Owned by the Italian Republic, it was given to the French government in 1936 for a period of 99 years, and currently serves as the French embassy in Italy. // First designed in 1517 for the Farnese family, the building expanded in size and conception when Alessandro Farnese became Pope Paul III in 1534, to designs by Antonio da Sangallo the Younger. Its building history involved some of the most prominent Italian architects of the 16th century, including Michelangelo, Jacopo Barozzi da Vignola and Giacomo della Porta. // At the end of the 16th century, the important fresco cycle of The Loves of the Gods in the Farnese Gallery was carried out by the Bolognese painter Annibale Carracci, marking the beginning of two divergent trends in painting during the 17th century, the Roman High Baroque and Classicism. The famous Farnese sculpture collection, now in the National Archeological Museum of Naples, as well as other Farnese collections, now mostly in Capodimonte Museum in Naples, were accommodated in the palace. (wikipedia)

• • •

The basic idea here is promising, but the execution is a gangly mess. If you're gonna do a theme, Do It Right, not just Good Enough. The numbers and languages are without logic—2 German, 2 French, 1 Spanish, who knows why. The bigger problem, though, is the cluing, which is just ... dumb. Boring and dumb. The phrases are in no way what someone "in a French play" or "in Madrid" etc. would say. They are ridiculous hybrids. "A number" could not be a more boring, inexact, and unfunny way to set up these clues. Man, I miss Merl. He could've made something magical out of a concept like this, because he would've been patient, found the Right answers, nailed the comical cluing, had a logical answer progression. I miss artistry. Further, I don't think the constructor or editor knows what sex therapists are. That clue is ridiculously inexact. There is literally no mention of "Freud" on the wikipedia "sex therapy" page. For a reason. There seems to have been some confusion of Freud's concern with sex and the more pragmatic, functional work that sex therapists do. Calling sex therapy "Freudian" is cheap and lazy. Also, again, inexact and unfunny. YOU HAVE A SEX PUN, FFS! DO SOMETHING WITH IT!

FARNESE is terrible fill. Foreign, partial, not exactly super-famous. Ugh. Sore Thumb City. And clue on ODES is just ridiculous. What the hell are ODES of Solomon? You know what else fits there and googles a bajillion times better? Yeah, you do. I know you do. "Oooh, what a clever trap," somebody thought. No, I have have heard of the damn trap for it to register as "clever" when I fall into it. ODES of Solomon, my eye. Rest of the fill is just fine. Ordinary. Decent. How in the world, though—How In The World—do you think it's OK to put *another* foreign number in the grid. Just ... randomly. Shoved in there. "Hey, maybe no one will notice if I shove a non-theme foreign number in my foreign-number pun puzzle!?" C'mon, man. I'll allow EIN, but DIECI I will not allow under any circumstances (6D: Italian ten). Again, where is the elegance? The attention to detail? Oh well. So much promise, so little payoff.

In superior puzzle news—big announcement from the American Values Club Crossword:

We have a big announcement [see?]. Nearly four years after leaving the pages of the Onion A.V. Club, later this month the AVCX will move under the auspices of Slate.com. Specifically, the weekly puzzle will be offered as part of the site's premium "Slate Plus" platform. We couldn't be prouder and more enthusiastic about this partnership! We'll kick it off in the coming weeks with a free puzzle by AVCX superfriend Angela Halsted. It's a big moment in our history, and we're grateful to all of our subscribers for your support.

You can (and should) still subscribe to AVCX directly—archives, bonus puzzles, etc.—but this is a cool extension of their media footprint, or whatever bizspeak is appropriate here. Hurray!

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor:Andrew Zhou

Relative difficulty:Easy

Yup that's supposed to be a D but I'm not re-filling in this grid and taking another screen shot

THEME:None

Word of the Day:BOETHIUS(11D: "The Consulation of Philosophy" author) —

Anicius Manlius Severinus Boëthius,^[1]^[2] commonly called Boethius^[3] (English: /boʊˈiːθiəs/; also Boetius/boʊˈiːʃəs/; c. 480–524 AD), was a Roman senator, consul, magister officiorum, and philosopher of the early 6th century. He was born four years after Odoacer deposed the last Roman Emperor and declared himself King of Italy, and entered public service under Ostrogothic King Theodoric the Great, who later imprisoned and executed him in 524 on charges of conspiracy to overthrow him.^[4] While jailed, Boethius composed his Consolation of Philosophy, a philosophical treatise on fortune, death, and other issues, which became one of the most popular and influential works of the Middle Ages. (Wikipedia)

• • •

It seems Rex found himself staring into the inky void of a technological blackout last night (no, he didn't pass out and spill whiskey on his computer, into his USBPORT-- it's a cable outage), so it's Lena here to wish you a happy Friday.

And so it is. This was a fun solve for me, and a quick one too. I scooted through the North and thought "hey hey slow down, puzzle, quit being so easy and intuitive." Remember my last sub-in post? So fun. But yeah that was also an Andrew Zhou puzzle! Maybe there are cosmic Crossworld forces afoot.

SHOCK JOCK (1A: One making waves over the waves) went in first, although I entertained SURF-something for a few seconds. SURFCELEB? "Shock jocks" were mentioned in a clue in Chris King's latest puzzle, so it was fresh in my brain on some level. WOMANIZING towering over INANIMATE OBJECTis pretty great, and the clue on the latter is both straightforward and clever: (17A: It has no life).

Lots and lots of good fill, which always makes a soupçon of classic crosswordese more obvious-- ERNEZEESUTEIBAR. Now that that's out of the way, let's pack up the car and take a trip to Natick.

BOETHIUS (11D: "The Consolation of Philosophy" author) crossing ROCHE (23A: Company that makes Tamiflu) must have tripped some folks up. Speed-sovling darling Austin Burns wasn't sure of that H in their crossing but ultimately guessed correctly:

I knew ROCHE but that's because I ordered thousands of dollars worth of antibodies from them in grad school. My problem was entirely BOETHIUS. I ordered antibodies from ROCHE and in my spare time didn't read philosophy. I know the heavy-hitters well enough, but BOETHIUS seems awfully underground, awfully "indie," as Philosophers go. And if you're clueless like me, there's no real indication that "The Consulation of Philosophy might be the work of ANCIENTS like (12A: Aeschylus, Sophoclese and Aristophanes) so that you don't start getting nervous when a funky ancient name starts to appear.

But the rest of the long fill really is very good: YOUVE BEEN SERVED, SCREENTIME, USB PORTS, AUTOTUNE.

Oh, and FOAMCORE may be (34D: Material for mounting photos), but it is also now my new favorite rock genre.

And speaking of music, enjoy some Joe Jackson-- this one goes out to Rex!

Signed, Lena Webb, Court Jester of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Retired Steeler Taylor / SUN 9-4-16 / School in Oxford informally / Spanish prefix with lineas / Multicolored candy in yellow package / Beverage since 1922 / One of two in adidas logo / Surrounder of la grande jatte / Giggle syllable

Battle of ___ Jima / MON 9-5-2016 / Actor Don of "Trading Places" / Worthless stuff / Sparkling Italian wine / Mobster John

Developmental rink org / TUE 9-6-16 / Qualifying match informally / Collectible art print in brief / Post-blizzard vehicle / Second longest river in Iberia / Cardio workout regimen

Way to stream Game of Thrones / WED 9-7-16 / La Boheme soprano / Genre for much Top 40 radio, for short / We convenience store sign / Singer of 2016 #1 hit Cheap Thrills

Bygone Broadway critic Walter / THU 9-8-16 / Biblical region from which name of language is derived / Football player's application / Man's name that's latin for honey / cry from veronese lover

Fur-lined cloak / 9-9-16 / Hideous foe of Popeye / Valve with disc at end of vertically set stem / Goddess who saved Odysseus / Adolescent program slangily

Modern brain-scanning procedure for short / SAT 9-10-16 / Crazy in 2010 Shakira hit / Capital where hell is pronounced johm riab sua / Animal whose name is derived from Latin for ghosts

Bond girl Adams / MON 9-12-16 / Crankcase attachments / Modest swimming garment / Remove as currency from fixed rate

Waffle introducer / TUE 9-13-16 / O'Neal's memoir of his rookie year / Central Florida metropolis informally / Cousin of baboon

Gamer's representation / WED 9-14-16 / Wine from single type of grape / Sofer of General Hospital / March locale of note

Anoint in western pacific / THU 9-15-16 / Isabel of mathetmatics fame / Squire message / Manila alternative in guessing game / Clan from ocean / Gaiter locales for short / Wand representer in myth / Croat who won academy award in 1999

Sound effects pioneer Jack / FRI 9-16-16 / Girl adopted by Silas Marner / Longtime voice of New York Yankees / Gigli pici for two / Shakespeare character who coins term primrose path / Eponym of bible history / Retro stereo component

Tickets in slang / SAT 9-17-16 / Book before Philemon / Cliched gift for prisoner / Staple of victorian architecture / Cry before rage-quitting / Round end of sort / Snack brand first produced at Disneyland in 1960s

Onward in Italy / SUN 9-18-16 / Reef-dwelling snapper / Sage swamp-dweller of film / Start of legalese paragraph / Handy take-along / Guy into hip-hop

Cub scout leader named after character in Jungle Book / MON 9-19-16 / 1981 Alan Alda/Carol Burnett comedy / Bite-size Krispy Kreme offering / Long-armed banana lovers

Kardashian matriarch / TUE 9-20-16 / Blade in pen / Strip of fabric used for trimming / J Lo's daughter with palindromic name / Set traditionally handed down to eldest daughter

Albanian coin / WED 9-21-16 / Flying furry friend from Frostbite Falls formally / Uhura portrayer zoe / Unit for lorry / French quencher / Pony Express's Missouri terminus informally / Jewelry worn by Barbara Stanwyck in Double Indemnity

Batman villain known as queen of cossacks / THU 9-22-16 / Palazzo architectural gem of Renaissance / Summit on Crete where Zeus was born

Kitchen drawers? / FRI 9-23-16 / Give a raise? / Film setting / Openings in the computer field?