Rex Parker Does the NYT Crossword Puzzle

Constructor: Joe Deeney

Relative difficulty: Medium-Challenging (for a M)

THEME:CALENDAR REFORM (52A: The change from Julian to Gregorian ... or what would be needed to make 20-, 31- and 40-Across possible?)— themers are just odd phrases related to days, weeks, months...

Theme answers:

"EIGHT DAYS A WEEK" (20A: 1965 Beatles hit that starts "Ooh, I need your love, babe")
"LAST WEEK TONIGHT" (31A: HBO show hosted by John Oliver)
"A MONTH OF SUNDAYS" (40A: 1974 John Updike novel)

Word of the Day: NGRAM (28D: Google ___ Viewer (tool for charting word frequency over time)—

The Google Ngram Viewer or Google Books Ngram Viewer is an online search engine that charts frequencies of any set of comma-delimited search strings using a yearly count of n-grams found in sources printed between 1500 and 2008 in Google's text corpora in English, Chinese (simplified), French, German, Hebrew, Italian, Russian, or Spanish; there are also some specialized English corpora, such as American English, British English, English Fiction, and English One Million; the 2009 version of most corpora is also available. // The program can search for a single word or a phrase, including misspellings or gibberish. The n-grams are matched with the text within the selected corpus, optionally using case-sensitive spelling (which compares the exact use of uppercase letters), and, if found in 40 or more books, are then plotted on a graph. (wikipedia)

• • •

This one felt unusually tough for a Monday, but my time was 3:08, which is only just "tough." I tripped right out of the gate—despite knowing very well who W dot E dot B dot Du Bois is, I would never ever have expected him to be used in a clue for WEB, so I thought "Whoops, a civil rights pioneer I don't know, probably an AVA or something ... next!" And then I could not see WIRE at all (1D: Electronic money transfer). So I was flailing from the jump. I follow baseball pretty closely, but in no way could I have gotten ROD CAREW from that clue without a bunch of crosses (17A: Only major-league player to enter the 3,000-hit club in the '80s). I've only ever seen REVERSI in crosswords, so I put it in only tentatively, and really couldn't commit to that last letter until the the cross went in (10D: Classic game with black-and-white discs). And NGRAM, forget it. I've (vaguely) heard of the Google NGRAM Viewer, but no way I was getting there from that clue. Needed every cross.

The theme ... well, the revealer doesn't mean much to me, so it was neither "aha" nor "haha." And the answers ... I think only "EIGHT DAYS A WEEK" really fits the (putative) theme. You talk about last week tonight, so that's not inconceivable. I guess one could imagine a calendar month where every day was Sunday, but that's not really what the expression is suggesting ... shrug. The grid seems oddly built. 74 words is pretty low for a Monday, which may be why it played harder than usual. There are some unpleasant plurals here, namely AHOYS and (especially) DUFFS (43D: Homer Simpson's favorite beers). Ugh, "beers," it hurts. It's his favorite beer, not "beers"! This is coming from someone who owns and wears a Duff t-shirt, so please trust me here.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

P.S. NEW YORK is the "title city" of "NEW YORK, NEW YORK" (7D: When repeated, Frank Sinatra title city); its being "repeated" has nothing to do with its being the "title city"; it's the "title city" and it's repeated; it's not the "title city" *because* it's repeated.

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Constructor: Mark MacLachlan

Relative difficulty: Normal

THEME:ATNO (67A: What "This" refers to, in this puzzle's theme: Abbr.)— theme answers begin "This," where "This" refers to the number of the clue, and the answer is the ELEMENT (a NOBLE GAS in each case) that has that clue number's AT. NO. (i.e. atomic number):

Theme answers:

NEON (10A: This, on the periodic table)
ARGON (18A: This, on the periodic table)
KRYPTON (36A: This, on the periodic table)
XENON (54A: This, on the periodic table
HELIUM (2D: This, on the periodic table)

Word of the Day: ERGOT (15A: Grain disease) —

Ergot (pron. /ˈɜːrɡət/UR-gət) or ergot fungi refers to a group of fungi of the genus Claviceps. // The most prominent member of this group is Claviceps purpurea ("rye ergot fungus"). This fungus grows on rye and related plants, and produces alkaloids that can cause ergotism in humans and other mammals who consume grains contaminated with its fruiting structure (called ergot sclerotium). (wikipedia)

• • •

This one gets points for having a really weird theme-answer layout, as well as, like, three revealers (!). Not necessary, not entertaining, but different, and different is ... well, it's not always good, but it's better than tediously familiar. I don't really get why I should care that they are all NOBLE GASes. I guess that gives the theme a certain unity, but so what? You're doing it just to ... do it? No play on "noble" or anything? And the whole "This" way of cluing (at least in the dowloadable .puz version) is really awkward. Apparently the method of indicating "this" varies across platforms, w/ some getting "arrows" (?). I didn't get arrows. And about AT. NO. ... see, here's the thing about AT. NO. ... AT NO time is that a good answer. Making it your third (!?) revealer doesn't elevate it from its permanent status as cruddy crosswordese no one wants to see unless absolutely necessary" (see also LT. YR.). There's the "This" trick and little else. It's just straightforward trivia for periodic table nerds. Fill is pretty weak up top (REVE ILES ERGOT REARM AGGRESS MTN), less horrible below.

[Warning: violence, profanity]

Weird to clue AUTO as [Modern prefix with complete or correct]. It is not a modern prefix. The terms "autocomplete" and "autocorrect" are modern, but that prefix ain't never gonna be modern, in any context, ever. It's an old prefix. Putting it in front of something new doesn't make it "modern." I have never seen ERGOT outside of crosswords. It is a word that destroyed me very early on in my crossword blogging career, and I have never forgiven it (see also ASOK, oy). And now I find out there's such a thing as "ergotism"!? I don't even want to click through to find out what it is. Sounds horrible. Although ... from a crossword perspective ... it is interestingly just one added letter away from "egotism." All hail the genius who can make an interesting theme out of that fact. Not much else to say about this one. Good night.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor: David J. Kahn

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME: THE OK CORRAL (GUNFIGHT AT THE) (28D: With 62-Across, renowned 1881 event that lasted about 30 seconds)— there is a "corral" of sorts in the middle of the grid made out of synonyms of "OK" (WELL, JAKE, FINE, FAIR); two of the gunfighters also make an appearance (DOC HOLLIDAY, IKE CLANTON) (17A: Deputy marshal at 62-Across, 11D: Outlaw at 62-Across)

Word of the Day: MACAO (1A: East Asia gambling locale) —

Macau (/məˈkaʊ/ ( listen)), also spelled Macao and officially the Macao Special Administrative Region of the People's Republic of China, is an autonomous region on the western side of the Pearl River estuary in East Asia. Macau is bordered by the city of Zhuhai in Mainland China to the north and the Pearl River Delta to the east and south. Hong Kong lies about 64 kilometres (40 mi) to its east across the Delta. With a population of 650,900 living in an area of 30.5 km² (11.8 sq mi), it is the most densely populated region in the world. A former Portuguese colony, it was returned to Chinese sovereignty on 20 December 1999. (wikipedia)

• • •

This gag is so ridiculous that I like it. Better bonkers than boring. Just the idea that a simple four-sided figure is supposed to be a "CORRAL" is hilarious to me. Like, if you drew that shape on a board and asked people to guess what it is all day long, no one would ever say "CORRAL.""Square! Box! Frame! [ten minutes later] Room? Postage stamp? [three hours later] uh ... Wyoming?" Etc. But the puzzle tells me it's a CORRAL and I'm like "well, look at that, it *is* a CORRAL! Got no livestock or horses in it, but sure!" Themewise, the only part I didn't really like was GUNFIGHT AT. Wish that space could've been used for something else theme-related. The theme is really only about the corral. The shape and the synonyms. "Gunfight" could've easily been incorporated into the clue for THE OK CORRAL, which stand just fine on its own. Instead the revealer—the punchline!—has a clue that starts [See 28-Down...]. Oof. Not elegant. But I don't know what else could've gone is the GUNFIGHT AT space. None of the other participants fit, except MORGAN EARP, who isn't exactly, uh, the famous one. Anyway, despite the revealer issues, I think the theme is a winner.

The fill is rough, though. MACAO (not MACAU!?) at 1-Across tells you things are gonna get Old School right quick. I wouldn't know that place existed without crosswords. And I'm still not sure SALUTERs or SNARLERs or OCHRES (plural?) exist, ouch. ARB is among my least favorite pieces of crosswordese. See also KOD. LUI abutting ÉTÉ is just mal. Gotta have a lot of SANG / FROID to attempt that cruddy French combo. But I've seen much worse grids, and WILLOWY and MONIKER are nice little words. So the puzzle's got problems, but not enough to keep me from basically enjoying it.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor: Alex Eaton-Salners

Relative difficulty: Medium-Challenging

THEME: homophones— Across clues are all homophones of *actual* clues (no way in hell I'm typing out all the Across clues and their homophones, sorrynotsorry)

Word of the Day: BISTRE (47D: Grayish to yellowish brown) —

bis·ter
ˈbistər/
noun
noun: bistre
a brownish-yellowish pigment made from the soot of burned wood.
the color of the pigment bister.
(google)

• • •

Wow. That was ... not fun. Printout of my puzzle looks kind of cool, since all the Acrosses are just one word (and whatever "Re" is), but this is one of those puzzles that makes you shake your head and go, "Why?"—a stunt puzzle that is probably interesting-sounding in your head, but on paper is laborious to solve. The grid is so unpleasant. On its own terms, it's nowhere near NYT-quality (even recent NYT-quality). It's like one of them grids you'd see in some Giant Book Of Supermarket Checkout Line Puzzles compendium. Nothing holding it together. Fill all mediocre and weird. Multiple MIROS, pffft, fine, OK, but multiple DRYROTS!? Nay. Nay. Neigh. And what on god's green earth is BISTRE!? Apparently that's not even the preferred spelling (?). We get a word that hasn't been seen in the NYT crossword in almost *30* years, and then we get the, what, British spelling? I spent more time than I should just checking and rechecking every BISTRE cross because, well ... look at it! It's hardly a word. I'd've bought BISTRO as a color before BISTRE.

And where is the joy in ... figuring out the homophones. I mean, is anyone going "Aha!" (joyfully, I mean) upon realizing [Lickers] (!?) = "Liquors"? Or (even less likely) upon realizing [Liquors] = RYES. You could never, ever, ever clue RYES that way in a regular crossword, so why do you get to do it here? RYES *kinds* of liquor. It would be like [Cars] cluing TOYOTAS. Absolutely not. I think the same thing goes for [Missal] -> [Missile] -> ATLAS. It's all pretty galling. I will say that I got to put my pretty finely-honed Downs-only skills to work here, at least at first. I refused to look at the Note (per usual) and when the Acrosses made no sense, I went into Downs-only mode, which is the way I typically solve all Newsday puzzles (except the Saturday Stumper), most early-week LA Times puzzles, the cruddy Sunday puzzle we get in our local paper ... any puzzle that is too easy to be much fun. So I got pretty far with Downs-only until I stalled a bit, revisited the Acrosses, and noticed what was going on. After I got theme, only BISTRE (!!) really floored me. With the Acrosses, I struggled with DEPOT (23A: Bass)—thought [Base] would mean "mean" or "low" or "bad," not a noun normally related to trains; ATLAS (32A: Missal)—didn't really know it was a missile; and GLIMMER (53A: Re)—kept saying "Reeee" to myself, hoping it would eventually mean something. But it's the musical note. Do RE mi fa etc. And "ray" -> GLIMMER. What fun!

Turns out the Note wasn't much use anyway:

So ignoring it completely was the right move. This is rarely not the case.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor: Zhouqin Burnikel

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: none

Word of the Day: TORTONI (56A: Ice cream treat) —

noun
noun: tortoni; plural noun: tortonis
an Italian ice cream made with eggs and cream, typically served in a small cup and topped with chopped almonds or crumbled macaroons.

• • •

This is a fine Friday. Fill is fine. Answers are fine. Fine. Adequate. None of the longer answers did much for me—whole NW was kinda dull, and only PILOT SCRIPT and the BERSERK part of WENT BERSERK really gave me any entertainment value. Rest of the puzzle is just mid-length short answers of an entirely forgettable variety. Again, there's nothing offensively bad or lazy or sloppy (well, maybe RIS ...). But there's little in way of KAPOW. The most notable moment for me was having no idea what TORTONI was (I've seen it in puzzles before, but still have yet to encounter it in real life). I also committed the unpardonable sin of writing in an answer without looking at the clue. Had SPIL- and wrote in the ... "L" (?!) (39D: Like milk you shouldn't cry over). So even if I *had* known what TORTONI was, it wouldn't have mattered because my answer ended in -LONI :( My TORTONI problems cascaded into the SW, where I couldn't see any of the Downs leading into that small corner—not REAL, not CONDO, not HOT AIR. So I had to dive in there and rely on IRA / OREIDA to bail me out. Not a great feeling, but you do what you gotta do.

Did you know that WENT BANANAS and WENT BONKERS both fit for 27D: Totally lost it (WENT BERSERK)? Well now you do. I knew it wasn't MOSHO Dayan, but I was not so certain it wasn't MOSHA Dayan, so BANANAS hung in there as a possibility for a bit. Do y'all really know that a czar's SON is called a grand duke?! In what ... nobility scheme are those things even ... things? "Grand duke" sounds like some made-up rank in a white supremacist organization, though it's entirely possible I'm (understandably) conflating Grand Wizard and David Duke. Anyway, SON was hard for me. Most of the rest–not hard for me. I'm mainly amusing myself now by imagining ILLINI as a really dope kind of pasta and IMALONE as a reclusive and melancholy form of sea snail. So it's probably time to call it a night.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor: Sam Ezersky

Relative difficulty: Medium-Challenging (very challenging for me, but I am an idiot who forgot that AMMAN, Jordan exists...)

THEME: none

Word of the Day: NYNEX (9D: Half of a 1997 telecom merger) —

NYNEX Corporation/ˈnaɪnɛks/ was a telephone company that served five New England states (Maine, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Rhode Island and Vermont) as well as most of New York state from 1984 through 1997. [...] NYNEX merged with Bell Atlantic on August 14, 1997, in what was, at the time, the second largest merger in American corporate history. Although Bell Atlantic was the surviving company, the merged company moved from Bell Atlantic's headquarters in Philadelphia to NYNEX headquarters in New York City. On June 30, 2000, Bell Atlantic acquired GTE to form Verizon Communications. (wikipedia)

• • •

I messed this up every possible way, starting with AXEL / LAHR at 1D: Spin out on the ice? / 19A: Farmhand in "The Wizard of Oz"and then over and over again after that. I confuse HERON and EGRET so I botched 2D: Symbol of the National Audubon Society too (apparently a lot of people confuse them—when I google "egret,""egret vs heron" is one of the predictive search options ... dear god, I hope that's because people confuse them and not because people make them fight). Unsatisfyingly, the only way I got started was by kinda sorta being sure of TYPEA (4D: Ambitious and high-energy) and then also SATS and ATEST. So a bevy of less-than-fun words got me my first traction. I did OK after that, bumbling along in a vaguely counterclockwise fashion. Always fun to deal with the DODO vs. BOZO dilemma ... and then I somehow put in PLACE instead of ELECT (48D: Give a seat). But eventually I got the whole bottom and came back up through the center and handled the NW and then ... things really got ugly.

As you can see, I thought there was something called NYNET. The "NET" part really, really felt plausible, both because it feels very telecommy and because that "T" ended up preceding a "W" in the Across, which felt like kismet—those letters go great together! Ugh. I abbreviate "crossword" as XWORD not infrequently on social media, but NYNET kept me from having any idea that that was the answer. But the worst problem up there was my incredible blanking on the [World capital once known as Philadelphia]. I mean, I even knew that that was going to put me in a Middle Eastern part of the world and I *still* couldn't retrieve AMMAN. I stared at A--AN and the only thing my brain would allow was ASWAN. Not a world capital. ASWAN. ASWAN. ASWAN. It just wouldn't let other possibilities in, except occasionally even stupider possibilities like ASLAN. Eventually, after being dead stopped with the above grid for what felt like ever, I ran the alphabet at the second blank in A--AN and eventually hit "M." And that was it. AMMAN to LOGARITHM (argh) and "US AND THEM" and it was all over quickly. From huge empty spaces to done because I was able to get the two "M"s in AMMAN. The gap between failure and success is very often that narrow.

Grid is nice, though the proper noun pop culture stuff is awfully heavy—and stacked in the NW. "Dark Side of the Moon" bores me (listened to it front to back for the first time this summer) and I couldn't name a song on that album but "Money"—"US AND THEM" just seems awfully obscure for a longer answer. It wasn't exactly a hit. And putting it next to the Green Hornet's "real" (LOL) name, ouch. I'm guessing tons of solver had never heard of "TRAP QUEEN," but as the clue says, it was a legit hit (unlike, for example, "US AND THEM"). I didn't groove on this too hard, but it's pretty alright. The fill is only wobbly in a few places (please somebody drive a stake through the heart of REUNES!), and the longer answers are mostly very interesting and contemporary. Good thing I knew ANITA / O'DAY—would've been a bloodbath without her (27A: With 33-Across, husky-voiced singer known as the Jezebel of Jazz). I might still be solving.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructors: John Guzzetta & Michael Hawkins

Relative difficulty: Slightly harder than average

THEME: “Wise Move” - Two-word base phrases whose first words each end in a Y with a long E sound; that sound has been moved to the end of the phrase. In other words, the “Y’s move”.

Theme answers:

GRAVE TRAINEES (23A: Interns at a cemetery?)

TWEET BIRDIES (38A: Take to social media following a good round of golf?)

DOG TREATIES (61A: Pacts between packs?)

STUD ROOMIES (73A: Ones sharing quarters at the most macho fraternity?)

SMART PANTIES (98A: Stylish underwear?)

GROCER STORIES (114A: Things swapped at a convention of supermarket owners?)

JUICE PARTIES (15D: Social gatherings where fruit drinks are served?)

COUNT FAIRIES (60D: Take attendance in a magical forest?)

Word of the Day: TUYERES (83A: Nozzles into blast furnaces) —

A tuyere or tuyère (French pronunciation: [tɥijɛʁ]; English: /twiːˈjɛər/) is a tube, nozzle or pipe through which air is blown into a furnace or hearth.

Air or oxygen is injected into a hearth under pressure from bellows or a blowing engine or other devices. This causes the fire to be hotter in front of the blast than it would otherwise have been, enabling metals to be smelted or melted or made hot enough to be worked in a forge. This applies to any process where a blast is delivered under pressure to make a fire hotter. (Wikipedia)

• • •

Rex is off celebrating his wife’s birthday, so you have a guest post today. And I just got home from watching the (problematically named) Edmonton Eskimos beat the Toronto Argonauts in a thrilling CFL game, so you have a guest poster in an unusually good mood. Which is fortunate for this puzzle, because even though the theme is pretty stale, I ended up kind of liking it. There is one obvious problem — GRAVE TRAINEES and TWEET BIRDIES don’t really work as answers, because the base phrases (“gravy train” and “Tweety Bird”) are never pluralized. Actually, I guess there are two obvious problems, the other being that none of these are really LOL funny (104A: It doesn’t mean “lots of love”). They’re more like “mildly amused smile” funny. I liked JUICE PARTIES and SMART PANTIES, but mainly because the base phrases (“juicy parts” and “smarty pants”) are fun to say.

(Okay, three problems, because the clue for TWEET BIRDIES made me think of the current U.S. President and his dual obsessions with golf and Twitter, and making me think about Trump is an automatic strike. I’m tempted to make a joke about how he might TWEET BIRDIES, but if he golfs as badly as he negotiates with Congress, administers disaster relief, runs a health care system, hires staffers, responds to hate crimes, and generally avoids behaving like an enormous garbage mound masquerading as a human being, then he’s never had a birdie in his life.)

If you’re going to do this theme, I think you need really killer theme answers — otherwise, you run the risk of the solving process becoming tedious. But while these weren’t great, they weren’t terrible either. I’d call it a serviceable theme that never quite wore out its welcome (it helped that I jumped around a lot more than usual, and didn’t actually figure out the theme until halfway through solving).

There’s some unusually poor fill here, like TOMTIT (?), POTSY (?!?!), IN AS (37A: Lead-in to much), NEEDER (!!!), and the worst part of the entire puzzle: the stupidly esoteric TUYERES crossing the defunct five-letter acronym US RDA right on top of ADA crossing EARLE. That’s going to be a point of failure for some people. So the bad fill was really bad, but the good news is that there’s a lot of rather good fill — POWER NAP, AWAY GAME, MEDIA STORM, SCORSESE, GET MOVING, SOUR MASH, and so on. I’m willing to forgive a lot of short crud and even a few outright clunkers when there’s some fun long stuff to keep me entertained. The stacks of 7’s in the NE and SW corners were also good, including ONE TO GO (118A: “Just about done”) and NOSE JOB (11A: Bridge work?). However, I did raise an eyebrow at the clue for MAIN MAN (112A: Homie) given the NYT crossword’s iffy history on race. I thought some of the cluing was quite fun, and in many cases harder than I’m used to on Sundays. My favourites were the deceptive 19D: Drawn (EVEN STEVEN), 62D: Routine problem, for short (OCD), and 99D: Cork popper (TOY GUN). And it’s always nice to see the funniest comedian on television, Samantha BEE, referenced in the puzzle.

A few shorter points:

I’m an English teacher and I didn’t know that the plural of “iamb” was IAMBI (40D: Some feet), so thatslowed me down a lot in getting the last themer.
67D: Watches via Netflix, say for STREAMS — how unexpectedly modern!
I rarely drink, so I never knew that NO TIPS was a 87A: Policy at a wedding’s open bar, maybe. That seems kind of mean, actually!
Not sure why I like 103D: Like much mouthwash (MINTY) so much. Maybe it’s the alliteration.
STONE TOOL(33D: Paleolith) is a weak answer — very green painty.
Apologies for any weirdness in the formatting — today I learned that Blogger really doesn’t like it when you try to post with an IPAD.

That should do it. Not a perfect puzzle, but enough good fill and amusing clues to keep me entertained while figuring out a simple but acceptable theme.

Signed, Ben Johnston, Tutor of CrossWorld

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Constructor: Jennifer Nutt

Relative difficulty: Medium (i.e. Normal Monday) (3:00)

THEME: KILLER WHALE (59A: Creature found "swimming" in 16-, 22-, 28-, 42- and 47-Across)—letter string "ORCA" is embedded (i.e. "swimming") in all the themers:

Theme answers:

RADIATOR CAP (16A: It must be removed before pouring coolant into an engine)
WINDSOR CASTLE (22A: Elizabeth II's home outside London)
PARLOR CAR (28A: Quaint train amenity)
INDOOR CAT (42A: Feline that doesn't stray)
LIQUOR CABINET (47A: Where rum and rye may be stored)

Word of the Day: BLAT (34D: Trombone honk, e.g.) —

verb
verb: blat; 3rd person present: blats; past tense: blatted; past participle: blatted; gerund or present participle: blatting
1.
make a bleating sound.
noun
noun: blat; plural noun: blats
1.
a bleat or similar noise.

"the blat of Jack's horn" (google)

• • •

Retro City. Reminds me of doing a puzzle in the early '90s, with my good friends OBI and ALEE and AGUE and AGRA and hey there's SRO (Sold Right Out!)*. And the theme—also old school. I've embedded my share of words across two words in a theme answer before, but usually the words change. Ooh, no, the first puzzle I ever ever made had WINK in it four times (in honor of Palin's debate performance, which gives you a rough idea of how long ago I made it). Did a "beer bellies" puzzle once, but the embedded words were all *different* beer types. And revealers should be clever—they should make the whole theme snap into focus in some interesting way. KILLER WHALE is just ... KILLER WHALE. I am unconvinced by the "swimming" part of the clue. It's just an embedded letter string, like so many embedded letter strings in so many puzzles that have come before. As a puzzle from a quarter century ago, it's fine. As a puzzle from today, it's ... a puzzle from a quarter century ago.

This was not hard, but there were definitely sloggy parts. Had LIE for FIB (10A: Something that might be said with fingers crossed behind the back), which is what happens when the "I" is the first thing to go in there. That tripped me. Then I just ... don't think of NGOs, like, ever (well, not in crosswords, anyway), so no idea there. If you'd asked me to name "train amenities" off the top of my head forever, I'd never have arrived at PARLOR CAR (whatever that is). "P.O.V." isn't a show that leaps to mind when I think of PBS (though I do know of it). MS DEGREE is just an odd / unexpected phrase. GRE was cross-referenced. I had the "X" and guessed EXITS before AXLES (51D: Highway tolls may be based on the number of them). My answer is very very good, though. Stupid "X." I like CODE WORDS, but not much else here, though the crossing of TUDORS and WINDSOR CASTLE is pretty cute.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

P.S. my wife thought this was a Tolkien-related theme until she got to the revealer

*it's actually Standing Room Only (or, in another context, Single-Room Occupancy)

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Constructor: Jeff Chen

Relative difficulty: Medium-Challenging (on the slow side for a Tuesday) (3:48)

THEME: CON MEN (43D: People who target the starts of 17-, 30-, 40- and 57-Across)— starts of those answers are words that describe victims of CONMEN:

Theme answers:

PIGEON COOP (17A: Base for long-distance carriers?)
CHUMP CHANGE (30A: A mere pittance)
SUCKER PUNCH (40A: Unexpected hit)
MARK ANTONY (57A: Cleopatra's lover)

Word of the Day:"PORKY'S"(46D: Raunchy 1981 comedy with two sequels) —

Porky's is a 1981 Canadian-American sex comedy film written and directed by Bob Clark about the escapades of teenagers in 1954 at the fictional Angel Beach High School in Florida. Released in the United States in 1982 with an R rating, the film spawned two sequels: Porky's II: The Next Day (1983) and Porky's Revenge! (1985) and a remake of the original titled, Porky's Pimpin' Pee Wee (2009) and influenced many writers in the teen film genre. Porky's was the fifth highest-grossing film of 1982. (wikipedia)

• • •

The theme is typical First Words stuff with a weirdly offset revealer. Nothing to write home about. The only thing I want to talk about isIBANKER (23D: Pro at building financial worth, slangily). I have never heard of this. I needed every single cross and still wasn't sure it was right. After I was finished, it still took me a few moments of thinking to figure out what the "I" even stood for. First tweet I saw online about the puzzle was this:

And I practically shouted "OH THANK GOD." Now I feel I can say, with impunity, that the decision to put this term in this position is profoundly, startlingly misguided. This is what happens when you become overly enamored of your giant word list—which you've apparently amassed without careful thought as to whether the world (i.e. crosswords) would be improved by all the thousands of alleged "slangily" terms there are in the world. You could easily do So Much Better in this section, replacing IBANKER with actual, real words—good ones!—without any, or with only slight, changes to surrounding fill. Don't get high on your own supply, constructors. Make good choices. Wow. OK. Moving on.

This puzzle was harder than normal, both because IBANKER (smh) and because of clues on the themers that are weird and hard. 40A: Unexpected hit (SUCKER PUNCH) was unexpectedly deceptive (I thought "hit" in the Broadway / Hollywood sense). And I have never ever been a fan of "?" clues on themers when "?"s are not part of the theme, i.e. they all should have them or none of them should have them. When I get a "?" on a themer (*especially the first themer*), I naturally assume the "?" is part of the theme. So of course there I am like some sucker / chump / etc., with the PIGEON part of 17A: Base for long-distance carriers?, wondering how the wordplay is going to express the theme... and all I get is COOP. I felt some heady mix of ennui and bathos as I filled in COOP. Is that all there is? Yes, that is all. Oh, and it has nothing to do with the theme. Enjoy.

Then there's the astonishing amount of crosswordese. Veteran constructors should not be serving us this much crosswordese. Conservatively, this is how much crosswordese this grid has:

Note that I let ORE and IOTA and IRA and even BNEG slide. I did enjoy UNDEROOS and "PORKY'S". I did not enjoy ANTONY and ANTONYMS being in the same grid. A six-letter shared letter string!? My construction software flags that *&$% at four. Six!? Wow. Now I want to build a weird crossword theme around the answer MARK ANTONYM. Ooh, if you just move the "M" to the end of MARK ANTONY you get ARK ANTONYM ... maybe there's something there ... I mean, probably not, but only by pursuing your most ridiculous notions are you ever going to find truly interesting themes. Your notebook should be 90% failed ideas! Minimum! Where was I? Oh yeah, IBANKER. Ugh. IBANKER? I hardly I-know her! Good day.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor: John Lithgow and Brendan Emmett Quigley

Relative difficulty: Challenging (those names...)

THEME: theater terms, reimagined— terms familiar from the theater are clued as if they were not ... from the theater:

Theme answers:

CURTAIN CALL (17A: Decision to go with drapes instead of blinds?)
CAST PARTY (10D: Fly fisherman?)
STAGE LEFT (33D: Why one missed the coach?)
SUMMER STOCK (55A: Accountant's shares in a company?)

Word of the Day: SECCO (48D: Painting on dry plaster) —

noun
noun: secco; noun: fresco secco
the technique of painting on dry plaster with pigments mixed in water. (Google)

• • •

Wow, ouch. Theme concept / quality, fine, but the cluing got tough, and the names in this grid, help me Rhonda! Brutal. I'm mad at myself for totally blanking on Minnie MIÑOSO (Manny Mota and Sal Mineo were running around in my brain creating interference), but I'm mad at the *puzzle* for thinking that KATISHA (!?!?!?!!) / KEYES was an acceptable crossing. Textbook Natick. That "Mikado" name is utterly uninferrable. I'm looking at it now and still don't quite believe it's real. And "Flowers for Algernon" is just some book I haven't thought about in 30 years—I'm quite sure I never knew the author's name. Presented with -EYES, well, there are several letters that can go there. "K" makes most sense, but KATISHA is in no way reassuring. LATISHA is an actual human name, but then LEYES really looks wrong. I honestly don't understand how this crossing doesn't send up red flags to constructor and editor alike. You put KATISHA (again, !?!?!!) in a grid, you gotta go through all the crosses and be meticulous about their fairness. You gotta pay special attention to proper nouns. I mean, these are just the basics. Ugh. You see how I cannot even focus on the theme because of this name mishandling stuff? Not the result you want. (Wife just walked up here and discussed her trouble spots—exactly the same as mine: baseball name, Natick crossing, and SECCO, whatever that is).

I like the theme, and I also like the little value-added bonus theater-related answers/clues, like APRON (26D: Area in front of the front row of a theater), FAT (61A: Like Falstaff), and PAL (44A: Broadway's "___ Joey"). I also really love the bizarre scenario conjured up by the clue on "I DON'T" (47D: Surprise declaration at the altar). There's this one weirdly inconsistent thing about the theme, which is bothering me for some reason—the clues on all the themers reimagine the meanings of *both* words in each theme answer (this is why those clues are so hard) ... except in the case of CURTAIN CALL, where the "curtain" remains a "curtain." True, it's a home decor curtain as opposed to a theater curtain, but tomato tomato. I'd call a fly fisherman a "casting party" (i.e. one who is casting). The STAGE LEFT clue (33D: Why one missed the coach?) is brutal, largely because the first thing I think when I see "coach" is not "stagecoach." Anyway, the theme is SOLID, not CORNY. The crosswordese is minimal. But the names, man. The names. Yeesh.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor: Ned White

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: HEAD OVER HEELS (39A: **One way to fall in love ... or a hint to the answers to the starred clues)— Two stacks of [Honcho] (i.e. a "head") over [Louse] (i.e. a "heel"), and then a [Honcho] over HEELS and a HEAD over [Louse] toward the middle of the grid (hence the "**" on the revealer ... I think)

Theme answers:

NUMERO UNO over SCOUNDREL
TOP BANANA over NO-GOODNIK
BIG WHEEL over "HEELS"
"HEAD" over DIRTY RAT

Word of the Day: LUSAKA (50D: Zambia's capital) —

Lusaka is the capital and largest city of Zambia. One of the fastest developing cities in southern Africa, Lusaka is in the southern part of the central plateau at an elevation of about 1,279 metres (4,196 ft). As of 2010, the city's population was about 1.7 million, while the urban population is 2.4 million. Lusaka is the centre of both commerce and government in Zambia and connects to the country's four main highways heading north, south, east and west. English is the official language of the city, but Nyanja and Bemba are also common. (wikipedia)

• • •

Getting a late start tonight, and have to get up early tomorrow, so I'll keep this brief. The theme is cute—the center is weird because the HEAD and HEELS are literal there, whereas up top and down below they are a [Honcho] or a [Louse], respectively. The two asterisks on the revealer clue are more bizarre than helpful. Also, aren't the stacks in the NW and SE really "HEAD OVER HEEL," singular? If this theme were done perfectly, then the various [Louse]s would be in plural form, giving you actual singular "head"s over plural "heels." The more I look at this thing, the wobblier it gets, so maybe I'll just stop looking.

The fill is really pretty bad. I've scrawled a list of the crosswordese on my printed-out copy of the finished grid, and I stopped at about twenty entries—the scrawl starts in the margin above SASHA and then continues unbroken, clockwise, all the way down to the margin outside OBLIGES. I started with RUDI and stopped at O-TYPE and you're just going to have to take my word for it that there are lots of answers in between. Speaking of O-TYPE, yuck. Here's a tweet about it, from a pediatrician.

RUES x/w VUE is NOTOK. I didn't have much trouble with this, except for a little bit in the SW, where I didn't know LUSAKA (my bad) and the whole STOPGO / SHOT thing was hard for me to figure out. I was lucky enough to pull NOGOODNIK out of thin air—no crosses; just tried it and it worked. I can see someone getting destroyed by the TOPOL / LUSAKA crossing. I certainly wouldn't have any idea about TOPOL if it weren't for crosswords, and we've already established that I didn't know LUSAKA, and if you don't know either, then that "L," well ... good luck! OK, I'm done. See you tomorrow.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor: Peter Wentz

Relative difficulty: Medium

THEME:none

Word of the Day: HODA KOTB (56A: "Today" co-host beginning in 2007) —

Hoda Kotb (/ˈhoʊdəˈkɒtbiː/HOH-də KOT-bee; Arabic: هدى قطب‎‎ Hudā QuṭbEgyptian Arabic pronunciation: [ˈhodæ ˈʔotˤb], born August 9, 1964) is an American television news anchor and TV host known as the co-host of NBC's Today Show's fourth hour with Kathie Lee Gifford. An Egyptian American, she won a Daytime Emmy Award in 2010 as part of the Today Show team. Kotb is also a correspondent for Dateline NBC. (wikipedia)

• • •

Pretty nice work. I have a few ... issues (see below ... and every day, I guess) but overall it was satisfying: wide-ranging, currentish, and amply tough. That SE corner in particular really made me work. I am very aware of who HODA is, but I know her only as ... HODA. "HODA& Kathie Lee..." That last name ... I don't even know how to pronounce it. Now that I look at it, I've definitely seen it before, but I'm all of a sudden very aware of how I *know* the last names of the all the other one-named talk-show celebrities (I think), but have never even heard hers said out loud. Why don't people say her name? Have they been saying it all along and I've just been mishearing it as something else? Say her name! Anyway, she is famous and I am not sufficiently attuned to daytime television, so the KOTB part took Work. That corner had a lot of names, including a non-specifically-clued YASIR (49A: Arabic name that sounds like a reply of agreement) (I considered YEMEN .... like "yeah, man"? ...) and our good old friend LAO-TSE, who somehow remained completely inscrutable to me until the very last cross (which was the "T" in KOTB). I also misread "service" as "device" in 42D: Digital storage service (iCLOUD), so that was semi-baffling. Oh, and lastly, I confused my Bucks and went with OWENS over O'NEIL at first (41A: Buck ___, first African-American coach in Major League Baseball). Good thing LOU Gramm was a gimme. That is one name-y corner!

Bullets:

15A: 1999 prequel that grossed over a billion dollars, familiarly (EPISODE I)— yeeeeesh no. I mean, OK, in some contexts, sure, but no. "Familiarly" would be "PHANTOM MENACE." So weird to put forth this answer as the actual title, even "familiarly." Or maybe there's some Latin-speaking "Star Wars" subculture and this answer is EPISO DEI, i.e. the ... something ... of God.
3D: Chucklehead (DIMWIT)— ah, the super-dated slang clue. Fittingly, I had NITWIT.
40D: ___ ape (gibbon) (LESSER)— I thought this was going to be someone's name. Like, maybe someone named LEVIN discovered the ape and it's now known as a LEVIN'S APE. Something like that.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor: Samuel A. Donaldson and Brad Wilber

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: none

Word of the Day: SEGNO (25A: Score mark indicating a passage to be repeated) —

In music notation, Dal segno (/ˌdælˈseɪnjoʊ/ or /ˈsɛɡnoʊ/; Italian pronunciation: [dal ˈseɲɲo]), often abbreviated D.S., is used as a navigation marker. From Italian for "from the sign," D.S. appears in sheet music and instructs a musician to repeat a passage starting from the sign shown at right, sometimes called the "segno" in English. (wikipedia)

• • •

This one had a raft of borderline obscurities (SEGNO, MASSIF, ANSELM, bleepin'STANHOPE!), but I'd seen them all before (actually ANSELM I just straight-up knew, yay medievalism). The answer that ended up giving me the most trouble was, weirdly, HOT PEPPER EMOJIS (55A: Sext symbols). Do people really do that? Send sexts w/ HOT PEPPER EMOJIS in them? I know that emoji as an indication of someone's relative attractiveness, but if you're sexting someone, presumably that symbol is unnecessary. Unless it's being used for its roughly phallic shape, in which case ...?! I am saying that I have trouble believing that said emojis are related to sexting. Related to indicating that you find someone hot, yes. But you'd use it more in a public declaration—like if you find a celebrity hot, maybe (?). I just have trouble believing that in an actual sexting situation, you'd crack out the hot pepper emoji. Too easily confused with a burning sensation. As I'm typing all this, I am realizing that though the NYT has grown fond of the term "sext," I'm not sure it knows what one actually looks like. Hell, I'm not sure I do. Oh, hey, it looks like Bustle specifically identifies the hot pepper as a sexting emoji. But it also thinks taco is a sexting emoji, so ... I dunno.

While stuff like SYSTOLES and IN A TIE and SET MENU doesn't really float my boat, I appreciated some of the unusual shorter stuff like COACH K and "I'M LIKE..." I'm unfamiliar with the JOB JAR. I have seen the chore wheel before, but not the JOB JAR. Do you just, like, draw "jobs" out of the "jar"? According to Martha Stewart, apparently so. Back-to-back "Star Wars" answers in the crossword, both with the word ONE in the title. I have had "ROGUE ONE" on my Netflix watch list forever, and yet I somehow can never quite bring myself to ... watch it. Always something else that wants my attention more. Sorta surprised to see "lame" used the way it is in 26D: Lame (but eco-friendly) birthday gift (E-CARD). It's perfectly common colloquial usage, but definitely seen as ableist language in some corners. I don't think using "lame" in this way is blatantly offensive ... and yet I find that I've completely stopped using it, the way I completely stopped using "retarded" to mean generically "stupid" many, many years ago. Also, if you think an E-CARD is "lame" in real life, you should see it in a crossword grid ... :(

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor: Tracy Gray

Relative difficulty: Easy

THEME:"Selfies"— clues are all imagined "Facebook status"es one might post to accompany a selfie; the answers are selfie-worthy locations, all of which have "ME" in them:

Theme answers:

CHRIST THE REDEEMER (23A: Facebook status: "2016 Summer Olympics and a day trip to one of the new Seven Wonders of the World!")
RIVER THAMES (31A: Facebook status: "Across the pond! And front-row seats to the Henley Royal Regatta!")
MALL OF AMERICA (51A: Facebook status: "Yes! Retail therapy at the largest shopping spot in the U.S.!")
CLUB MED (70A: Facebook status: "Ahhhh ... Sun and surf in Cancún, Mexico! Bring on the unlimited piña coloadas!")
LITTLE MERMAID (86A: Facebook status: "Hej from København! This statue turned 100 years old in 2013 but is still a beauty!")
TIMES SQUARE (106A: Facebook status: ""10-9-8-7 ... Ringing in the New year with 1,000,000 of my newest, closest friends!")
JEFFERSON MEMORIAL (116A: Facebook status: "History abounds! Neo-Classical architecture surrounded by gorgeous cherry blossom trees. Next stop ... the White House!")
MADAME TUSSAUD'S (16D: Facebook status: "Vegas, baby! And who would believe I'm standing next to Beyoncé and Katy Perry!")
METLIFE STADIUM (50D: Facebook status: "Nosebleed seats—but home-field advantage! GO GIANTS!!!")

Word of the Day: ORANT (104A: Praying figure in Christian art) —

Orans, a loanword from Medieval Latinōrāns translated as one who is praying or pleading, also orant or orante, is a posture or bodily attitude of prayer, usually standing, with the elbows close to the sides of the body and with the hands outstretched sideways, palms up. It was common in early Christianity and can frequently be seen in early Christian art. In modern times, the orans position is still preserved within parts of the Orthodox, Anglican, Episcopal, Lutheran and Catholic liturgies, Pentecostal and charismatic worship, and the ascetical practices of some religious groups. (wikipedia)

• • •

ORANG > ORANT (and I should note that ORANG > very few crossword answers)

I'll give this one some credit for its currency and conceptual clarity. These answers all definitely feature ME at some famous place or landmark, and so the title is apt and the theme is consistent. I don't think the theme is that *interesting* (there must be tons more places, landmarks, etc. with the simple two-letter string "ME" in them) and the clues ... well, they're about as banal as a typical FB post, I'll give them that. They are contrived to include trivia that will allow you to get the answer, which makes sense from a puzzle standpoint, but which sometimes strains the plausibility of the clues as actual FB statuses. This theme is definitely better than average Sunday puzzles of late, and yet still definitely not as splashy and entertaining as a Sunday should be. But I'll take "not knee-bucklingly terrible" at this point, and this puzzle certainly fits the bill.

The "humor" here is pretty minimal. Would've been nice to see some more thought and pizzazz put into the clues. Cluing is particularly important in a puzzle like this, where there's no real wordplay or other engaging gimmick going on—just a bunch of unrelated stuff. I was somewhat confused at the outset, because I thought the various landmarks were the ones taking the selfies, i.e. I thought maybe CHRIST THE REDEEMER had a Facebook page that he was updating. Careful reading of the clue would've made it clear that that wasn't what was going on, but careful reading of the clue also would not have made anything clear at that point, so ... who cares? Got the landmark, moving on. I did get confused when I thought the next imaginary FB poster was MADAME TUSSAUD, but she didn't fit without the apostrophe S. Then I realized these weren't supposed to be from famous people / places, but from some imagined ME that had visited these places. The rest of the puzzle was very easy after that, with only METLIFE STADIUM giving me any trouble. Is that where the *New York* Giants play? Football is garbage and I don't watch (anymore).

AGEWORN feels (aptly?) antiquated (48D: Damaged over time) and ARTWARE is ... hey, what *is* ARTWARE? (29A: Valuable china, e.g.) Hang on... it appears to just be stuff you eat with or on or drink out of that can be collected as art. Huh. Too fancy for me. I had trouble spelling MORTICIA (MORTITIA) (15D: Wife on "The Addams Family") and KAHLIL (KHALIL) (2D: "The Prophet" author Gibran). The hardest answers for me to get was CAPTCHA (70D: Challenge to prove you're human). I thought it was some kind of TEST, like a Turing Test. Without context, that one was really tough to come up with. Also hard: HINT (92D: This answer ends in "T," e.g.). If that clue is a HINT, well, it ain't much of one. Ironically, an actual *clue* would've been much more helpful. In fact, the more that I think of it, a clue *is* a hint, so this whole cluing concept for HINT is ridiculous. Lastly, my favorite ultimatum now is "MORELS! OR ELSE!" (96D + 97D).

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor: Timothy Polin

Relative difficulty: Challenging for a Monday (3:38) (that's 40-ish seconds longer than average, an eternity on a Monday)

THEME: Periods— ordinary words ending in -AGE are imagined as phrases where the second word is AGE:

Theme answers:

ANCHORAGE (17A: Period dominated by the likes of Dan Rather and Peter Jennings?)
WRECKAGE (26A: Period when every car was a junker?)
BONDAGE (39A: Period known for its 007 movies?)
PILLAGE (41A: Period of fuzzy sweaters?)
COVERAGE (50A: Period when tribute bands thrived?)
SHRINKAGE (64A: Period when psychiatrists ruled?)

Word of the Day: MOUE (34A: Sour expression) —

noun
noun: moue; plural noun: moues
a pouting expression used to convey annoyance or distaste. (Google)

• • •

This puzzle has a few things going for it. Sadly, none of those things have to do with the theme, which is kind of [Period associated with clothing?]. There are lots of words that end in -AGE. You can do this dumb theme all day long and then some. The clues are corny, and the gag wears out quickly. A "?" theme on a Monday is unusual, and unusually tough, though all the -AGEs made up for that somewhat, but then much of the rest of the grid was harder than usual to solve, so the overall result was a Challenging puzzle. Not off-the-charts hard for a Monday, but definitely on the hard side. But I don't mind that. I mind AGE AGE AGE AGE etc ad infinitum ad astra forever and ever. I also mind the tame clues. [Period of fuzzy sweaters?] for PILL AGE!? Wow. Lots better options on the table, there.

Oh, but back to the few things this puzzle has going for it: all the flashy long Downs. On a Monday, those are pretty nifty. Abutting long answers like that definitely opens things up (and generally adds to difficulty). Nice to have so much colorful fill early in the week. In general, the fill is decent. Not sure how we're getting OWIE *yet again*, but here we are. Actually, the more I look at the shorter stuff, the less decent it becomes, so let's just look at DUCK BLIND and BEHEADED and ZIGGURAT et all. Major hangups for me today:

Totally forgot IMDB existed. I just blanked. I never go there any more, so it went totally off my mental radar
IMAC, IPOD, IDUNNO (at 1-Down)
AMEN for AS IF (15A: "Yeah, right!") (note: "AS IF!" and "PHAT!" are both in "Clueless" (1995), which I just rewatched yesterday.)
TEENAGER for TEENIDOL (22D: Elvis in the 1950s or Justin Bieber in the 2010s)
I spelled ZIGGURAT all kinds of ways before the crosses helped me out with the vowels (25D: Stepped tower of ancient Sumer)

See you Tuesday.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor: Damon Gulczynski

Relative difficulty: Medium (I was slow, but the puzzle is a plus-size 16 squares wide)

THEME: ANOTHER DIMENSION (59A: What a sci-fi portal might lead to ... or what's added successively to the ends of the answers to the starred clues)— each step in the sequence POINT LINE PLANE SPACE represents an incremental jump of one dimension

Theme answers:

"THAT'S NOT THE POINT" (18A: *"You fail to understand what I'm saying")
PICK-UP LINE (24A: *Cheesy fare served at a bar?)
"SNAKES ON A PLANE" (38A: *2006 cult-classic action film)
"I NEED SPACE" (53A: *"This relationship is smothering me)

Word of the Day: Jerome KERN (57D: Jerome who composed "Ol' Man River") —

Jerome David Kern (January 27, 1885 – November 11, 1945) was an American composer of musical theatre and popular music. One of the most important American theatre composers of the early 20th century, he wrote more than 700 songs, used in over 100 stage works, including such classics as "Ol' Man River", "Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man", "A Fine Romance", "Smoke Gets in Your Eyes", "All the Things You Are", "The Way You Look Tonight", "Long Ago (and Far Away)" and "Who?". He collaborated with many of the leading librettists and lyricists of his era, including George Grossmith Jr., Guy Bolton, P. G. Wodehouse, Otto Harbach, Oscar Hammerstein II, Dorothy Fields, Johnny Mercer, Ira Gershwin and E. Y. Harburg. // A native New Yorker, Kern created dozens of Broadway musicals and Hollywood films in a career that lasted for more than four decades. His musical innovations, such as 4/4 dance rhythms and the employment of syncopation and jazz progressions, built on, rather than rejected, earlier musical theatre tradition. He and his collaborators also employed his melodies to further the action or develop characterization to a greater extent than in the other musicals of his day, creating the model for later musicals. Although dozens of Kern's musicals and musical films were hits, only Show Boat is now regularly revived. Songs from his other shows, however, are still frequently performed and adapted. Many of Kern's songs have been adapted by jazz musicians to become standard tunes. (wikipedia)

• • •

Again with the renegade "?" theme clue! (24A: *Cheesy fare served at a bar?). Ugh. If your theme is not entirely "?"-based, save your "?" for the rest of the fill, man. It's just common courtesy. This theme is interesting to contemplate upon completion (kudos to you if you noticed the theme before getting the revealer). No D — One D — Two D — Three D. Alrighty then. But again we run headlong into the stubborn fact that the NYT doesn't give a *******$&%&$*# what happens beyond the theme. The fill is a cavalcade of last-century laffers, STET ACAI! LEI OONA! MOLE OLE! AERO CHARO! ELSA LECAR! (best stripper name ever!) What is the ETA on better fill? Maybe we'll see some INDO near future? I'm SOU upset—why does the puzzle keep PAREE-tending this is acceptable? EWE know what I mean? KERN you believe it? Ugh, I'm at a LOESS.

I spent at least two full seconds wondering what an IPAD DRESS was (37D: Certain network ID). I got the IPAD part quickly, and, well, it's hard to unsee that IPAD once you've seen it. I once again wrote in OOMA instead of OONA for 32A: Chaplin of "Game of Thrones" because once again, no matter how many times I get the Chaplin clue (and it's A Lot by now), I freeze up and pick the wrong letter. Is OOMA even a name??? UMA, OONA. That should be so easy to remember. I thought 5A: Shakespeare, informally was BARD, and then, I thought, "Oh, *informally*...," and wrote in BILL. This left me wondering what BIND POWER was (5D: Energy source from a "farm"). Hardest clue for me was, in retrospect, the cleverest—70A: Horses that could be hounds or badgers? (NAGS). I kept wondering what kind of weird equine slang I was dealing with; only after finishing did I see that NAGS is a synonym of "hounds" and "badgers" (the verbs, not the animals). OK, I gotta get some sleep now. Later.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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Constructor:Jules P. Markey

Relative difficulty:Easy

THEME:BREAK UP THE BANKS(62A: Wall Street reformer's urging ... or a hint to this puzzle's circled squares)—Two geological banks, RIVER and SNOW, and two storage banks, SPERM and DATA are "broken" across phrases.

Theme answers:

D(RIVE R)ECKLESSLY (17A: Weave or tailgate, say)
"IT'(S NO W)ONDER" (25A "I'm not at all surprised")
GIVE(S PERM)ISSION (41A: Allows)
SOL(D AT A) LOSS (52A: Bailed out on some stock, say)

Word of the Day:LOAMY(39D: Like good farm soil) —From Merriam-Webster:

1 a:a mixture (as for plastering) composed chiefly of moistened clay

b:a coarse molding sand used in founding (see ⁵found)

2:soil; specifically:a soil consisting of a friable mixture of varying proportions of clay, silt, and sand

(Bonus Word of the Day:FRIABLE)

• • •

Hi, it's Lena. I think I would like this puzzle even if I wasn't eating honey-peanut butter-banana crackers and drinking neat gin like I am now. For a Wednesday, this is fine by me. The theme is solid-- there is a diverse sampling of bank types and they're broken in a pleasingly symmetrical way: once in RIVE R and S PERM and thrice in S NO W and D AT A. Also I like the finger wag at those who DRIVE RECKLESSLY but it would be much more au courant if the clue mentioned behind-the-wheel smart phone usage. Please don't use your phone while driving <-- PSA

The fill is not bad but I was definitely aware of OAS TSA NEA SST and KAN. The longer fill was lively, active, rhythmic with CRIME WAVE(3D: Reason to summon Batman) and FIRE DANCE (38D: Burning Man performance). I don't want to do any research regarding the actuality of a "fire dance" at Burning Man so I'm just going to trust Jules and Will.

The clues were straight-forward. In fact, I don't think I can find a single question mark clue.

Those teeth! God I love this song. Alright time for bed-- the song is done, the puzzle is done, the gin is done, and the honey-peanut butter-banana crackers are done and one of them had a bird face:

Signed, Lena Webb, Court Jester of CrossWorld

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Constructor: Jacob Stulberg

Relative difficulty: Challenging (for me, anyway ... probably actually Medium)

THEME: MT. EREBUS (59A: Southernmost active volcano in the world ... or a cryptic hint to certain squares in this puzzle)— an "MTE" rebus puzzle

Theme answers:

FORT SUMTER / FARM TEAM
ASSAM TEA / WISDOM TEETH
TIM TEBOW / WILLIAM TELL

Word of the Day: Larry ELGART (46A: "Bandstand Boogie" bandleader Larry) —

Lawrence Joseph Elgart (March 20, 1922 – August 29, 2017) was an American jazz bandleader. With his brother Les, he recorded "Bandstand Boogie", the theme to the long-running dance show American Bandstand. (wikipedia)

• • •

Filled in the NW corner super fast and then just died. Next section over, I had OAFS(4A: Klutzes) and then ... nothing. Actually jumped down to the bottom via the cross-referenced AREA, picking up REST and starting again from there (60D: With 23-Across, picnic table locale). So I ended up getting MT. EREBUS pretty early, but didn't really *get* it, and then when I *did* get it, my brain processed it as "MT" REBUS. I mean, you would rebus MT because a MT is a thing (abbr. for Montana, abbr. for mountain), whereas an "MTE" rebus ... WHAT THE &$^% is an MTE!?!?!?!?! Is this seriously a "three-random letter" rebus? My brain was right to reject that &$^%. I've never seen a more meaningless rebus square. Unbelievable. I understand seeing "REBUS" inside "MT. EREBUS" and thinking "Ooh, tempting!" But I do Not understand thinking it would be fun to make your repeated rebus square "MTE." That, I do not understand.

I finished with an error, namely ELZART / ZAMBIA. There is so much wrong with this cross. First of all, who the &$^% is Larry ELGART?! What the ... why ... I'm just staring at his name, and even his wikipedia entry, dumbfounded that his name is a thing that is considered common knowledge. EL-ART coulda been so many letters. And then you give me -AMBIA, when ZAMBIA is an actual African country yet somehow *not* the actual answer (47D: Its capital is an Atlantic port). But then the actual answer is GAMBIA!? And I'm like "Why ... don't I know about this country?" Well, two reasons. One, do you know how small it is? They need an inset even to find it on the map they use on its own wikipedia page:

Further, do you know what the country is *actually* called (per its wikipedia page)? Here:

The Gambia (/ˈɡæmbi.ə/ ( listen)), officially the Republic of The Gambia,^[3] is a country in West Africa that is entirely surrounded by Senegal except for its coastline on the Atlantic Ocean at its western end. It is the smallest country in mainland Africa.

What the hell!? Straight-up GAMBIA isn't even an option here. How are you gonna perpetrate like GAMBIA is a country without the damned definite article!? Come on, man? This ELGART / GAMBIA crossing is a hellscape. It's so bad, it made me forget how dumb the rebus was. And now all I can think of are the non-entity-ness of "MTE" and the fact that ZAMBIA is landlocked and like 5500 miles away from *THE* GAMBIA. You wanna talk about other elements of this puzzle, go right ahead. I haven't got time for the pain. It's all too much. Besides, I gotta start getting ready for the Malaysia Technology Expo 2018! See you all there!

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

P.S. if that answer was originally Ansel ELGORT and the editor changed it I Swear To God ... !

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Constructor: David Steinberg

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: none

Word of the Day: Bob IGER (11A: Disney exec Bob) —

Robert Allen Iger (/ˈaɪɡər/; born February 10, 1951) is an American businessman who is chairman and chief executive officer (CEO) of The Walt Disney Company. Before Disney, Iger served as the president of ABC Television from 1994 to 1995 and the president and chief operating officer (COO) of Capital Cities/ABC, Inc. from 1995 until Disney's acquisition of the company in 1996. He was named president and COO of Disney in 2000, and later succeeded Michael Eisner as CEO in 2005, after a successful effort by Roy E. Disney to shake up the management of the company. (wikipedia)

• • •

A fine Friday effort. I had no idea there was a PINK VIAGRA (17A: Sex drive enhancer introduced in 2015), but everything else was reasonably familiar, and the grid was solid, balanced, and entertaining. LINKEDIN PROFILE (3D: It might list your accomplishments) is an original answer, but somehow also a depressing one. I associate LinkedIn with people who want to connect with me and I don't know why. With desperate self-promotion and "networking." With sadness. I'm sure it's nice, but the LINKEDIN PROFILE is a dystopian thing to me. There were no answers I Loved and there were no real trouble spots, so it's hard to know what exactly to write about. The main thing I learned is that ILER and IGER are both crosswordese and apparently I don't know the difference. Actually, as I wrote in ILER, I sorta knew that was the "Sopranos" actor, but honestly I completely forgot IGER existed, so I just waited for GET AN A FOR EFFORT to take care of things. Oh, and I learned that [Evidence of disuse] fits not one not two but three different answers that fit the pattern _UST. Weird (24D).

Bullets:

27D: Wonderful, in old slang (ACES)— I use this expression all the time. Finally, I am old. Will the crossword start to feel like a comfy cardigan now? I can't wait.
1D: Samuel of English history (PEPYS)— had trouble with this one despite the fact that I *teach* PEPYS every year. I am an English *literature* teacher. Therein lay the problem, I think. I know I rag on cross-referenced clues all the time, but I have no idea how you can have PEPYS in the same grid as DIARY ENTRY and *not* link them. PEPYS's incredibly important diary is the only reason anyone knows him at all.
21A: Steal (PIRATE)— had the "PI-", went with PILFER
49D: TV clown name (KRUSTY)— was looking for a live-action clown like BOZO or BOBO or something like that; so yet again, as with PEPYS, I get held up on an answer that is *very* familiar to me.
53A: French Christian (DIOR)— nice (non-DIRTY) TRICK clue. I had the "DI-" and wanted ... something related to DIEU.
1A: Line judge? (PALM READER)— this is the best clue of the day, appropriately positioned in the 1-Across position. That's what you do with your best stuff: showcase it!
51D: Quidditch position (SEEKER)— I wrote in KEEPER. Please tell me that is also correct.
18A: Heaps (ATON)— always fun to play the "ATON v. ALOT" game. At least this time, this annoying little phrase had an opposing counterpart in AFEW (54A: Not many)

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Constructor: Roland Huget

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium

THEME: none

Word of the Day: PAPETERIE (13D: Container for writing materials, such as fancy stationery) —

1.
a box for holding stationery, especially an ornamental one.
(dictionary.com)

• • •

Took one look at the grid and thought "ugh." Ultra-low word count puzzles are rarely any fun. They're often very hard, and the payoff slight or non-existent. This one ... I've seen uglier, but it still wasn't anywhere near enjoyable. At least it was easy—I finished in under 8 without really trying. How? Well, you know, you hack. Put the RE- in at the beginning of 2D: Prepare for a purchase return, perhaps; put the -IC at the end of 3D: Containing element #56; write in AFATE because it's a gimme (4D: ___ worse than death). That last one was crucial. I put in MOVIE for 5D: "M," e.g. (NASAL) (why is "M" capitalized there?), which could've hurt me, but once I had all those little answers / prefixes / suffixes in place, I saw 21A: New York's state motto. Hey, I live in New York state. I know that one. "EXCELSIOR!," I exclaimed, as I proceeded to destroy the NW corner.

But the thing about this kind of grid is that getting one corner is largely meaningless, in that you can't build on it. The tiny little escape hatches mean that every corner is essentially a new puzzle. Yet somehow all of them went down. AMO MOONIE SALTERS REAWAKENS COURSED CAT BALLOU went in without much effort. COARSEN dropped right down into the SE off just the "C" (37D: Make rough). I felt slightly bad about knowing crosswordesey crap like UGO (39A: Actor Tognazzi of "La Cage aux Folles")—feels like cheating—but you take what you can get, and I did, and the SE went down without a fight (in fact, I trounced it so bad that I'm only just now seeing the word ANTAE, dear lord, what? (46D: Architectural features of Greco-Roman temples). That make UGO look (u)good.

So all was left with was the SW corner, but I was not at all hopeful. I was gonna have to back into that corner off of just the very last letters in a couple answers. Unlikely. But then I had another dumb-luck moment: I had been reading about ESTES Kefauver just this morning, specifically about his role on the United States Subcommittee on Juvenile Delinquency in 1953. So boom, ESTES goes in, boom INANE goes in, I infer the "S" at the end of MERCS, I infer the "N" before the "ESS" at the end of TRITENESS, that "N" gives me TITAN, and I fill that corner from the bottom up without much hassle. And thus, despite a daunting-looking grid, as well as a &^$%ing *euchre* clue (20A: Jack of the trump suit, in euchre) that I still don't understand and don't care enough about to look up, I tore this thing apart. Feels good. The success, that is. The puzzle itself didn't feel good at all.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

P.S. ridiculously bad to have PAPERY and PAPETERIE in the same puzzle

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]

Civil rights pioneer Du Bois / MON 10-9-17 / Google viewer tool for charting word frequncy over time / 1974 John Updike novel / Homer simpson's favorite beers

Grain disease / TUE 10-10-17 / 1967 Montreal event / Fur trader John Jacob / Superhero group including Beast Cyclops

East Asia gambling locale / WED 10-11-17 / Start of dieter's brag / Saison sur la seine

Grayish to yellowish brown / THU 10-12-17 / Max popular video game series of 2000s / Classical rebuke / Giant first inductee in WWE Hall of Fame

18th century pioneer in graph theory / FRI 10-13-17 / Sites associated with innocence project / Lesser player of uncle leo on seinfeld / 1997 film whose poaster shows woman wearing dog tags

Farmhand in Wizard of Oz / SAT 10-14-17 / Half of 1997 telecom merger / Britt real name of Green Hornet / Eponym of North Carolina city / husky voiced singer jezebel of jazz / Hit TV series based on Colombian telenovela / 2015 #2 hit for rapper Fetty Wap / Neighbor of Twelve Oaks in fiction

Office restoration / SUN 10-15-17 / Bit from Sunshine Biscuits / Nozzles into blast furnaces / Cork popper / Ones holding down things?

Quaint train amenity / MON 10-16-17 / Substitute terms for sensitive subjects / Long-running PBS film series

Raunchy 1981 comedy with two sequels / TUE 10-17-17 / South Asian shade tree / Brand of kidswear with superman batman options / Pro at building financial worth slangily / 1951 film featuring Nero / High level HS class with integrals

Nanki-poo's pursuer in Mikado / WED 10-18-17 / Nine-time baseball All-Star nicknamed Cuban Comet / Painting on dry plaster / Lure with phony online persona / Pioneering botanist

French network / THU 10-19-17 / One of billions in puffball / Sch backer

1999 prequel that grossed over billion dollars familiarly / FRI 10-20-17 / Symbol for member of Anonymous / Arabic name that sounds like reply of agreement / Frequent locale in comic strip Andy Capp / Big name in digital security

Open one-seated horse-drawn carriage / SAT 10-21-17 / Duke legend to fans / Mideast's city of jasmine / Toon who often congratulated himself with you've done it again / Dweller between zambezi limpopo rivers / Locale of Dostoyevsky's exile

Praying figure in Christian art / SUN 10-22-17 / Challenge to prove you're human / Prime setter informally

Stepped tower of ancient Sumer / MON 10-23-17 / Online source of film trivia / Campus sanctuary in modern parlance / Kerchief worn as headgear

One-named Spanish-born actress / TUE 10-24-17 / Japanese eel-and-rice dish / Mustachioed character on Simpsons / Loamy soil / Horses that could be hounds badgers / 2006 cult classic action film

Take an Ax to / WED 10-25-17 / Like good farm soil / Eggs on / Source of protein in veggie burgers

Southernmost active volcano in world / THU 10-26-17 / Lily Tomlin's one ringy dingy character on old TV / Opera that takes place in 1800 premiered in 1900

Samuel of English history / FRI 10-27-17 / Facepalm inducer / Letters for the detail-averse / Titaness in Greek myth / English car with winged logo / 1960s pop trie in Rock Roll Hall of Fame / Allen onetime US poet laureate

Crosswise on a ship / SAT 10-28-17 / 1950s politico Kefauver / Architectural features of Greco-Roman temples