Constructor: Katie Hoody
Relative difficulty: Medium (gimmick was simple, but overall cluing was tough)
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THEME: TOO LONG; DIDN'T READ (56A: Cheeky review of 18-, 24- and 46-Across) — long books ... that's (literally) it
Some notes:
Relative difficulty: Medium (gimmick was simple, but overall cluing was tough)
Theme answers:
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Wow. A puzzle for people who hate reading. And cats. I am ... neither of those people. The entire puzzle seems to exist so that the revealer can sneer at the idea of reading long books, which is to say, sneer at the idea of reading in general. You know what's TOO LONG and I wish I DIDN'T READ? That revealer. That "review" isn't "cheeky," it's idiotic. Nobody writes it out like that. It's TL;DR, and only TL;DR. Plus, are these books really so "long"? They don't strike me as iconically long. Not like War and Peace or Infinite Jest or, if you really want a doorstop, Clarissa (~950,000 words!). DAVID COPPERFIELD is just ... a novel by Dickens. I read it earlier this year. It's normal Dickens novel length—roughly the same length as [deep breath] Martin Chuzzlewit, Nicholas Nickleby, Bleak House, Little Dorritt, Dombey and Son, and Our Mutual Friend (all 340,000+ words). And while it's true that I have not read LES MISERABLES or ATLAS SHRUGGED, it ain't beause they're "TOO LONG," for god's sake. I don't demand Reverence of Literature from my crosswords, but this kind of shallow sneering nonsense can ... let's be unprofane and say "take a hike." Oh, is the book long? Is reading hard? Are you tired? Do you want a lollipop? Grow up. You don't have to read books if you don't want to, but your inability or unwillingness to read anything longer than a Tweet is a You problem. Don't blame the books. The books are exactly the length they're supposed to be. Also, if you're shouting "BAD KITTY!" at your actual kitten for any reason, let alone for the mere fact of "spilling milk," I'm taking your kitten away from you, asshole. Why are you giving the kitten milk, anyway? You clearly shouldn't own a cat. Give me the cat. You go manage your anger. Kitty and I are gonna curl up with a long book.
- DAVID COPPERFIELD (18A: 1850: 350,000+ words)
- LES MISERABLES (24A: 1862: 530,000+ words)
- ATLAS SHRUGGED (46A: 1957: 550,000+ words)
The Thénardiers, commonly known as Monsieur Thénardier (/təˈnɑːrdi.eɪ/; French pronunciation: [tenaʁdje]) and Madame Thénardier, are fictional characters, and the secondary antagonists in Victor Hugo's 1862 novel Les Misérables and in many adaptations of the novel into other media.They are unscrupulous working-class people who blame society for their sufferings. Early in the novel, they own an inn and cheat their customers. After they lose the inn in bankruptcy, they change their name to Jondrette and live by begging and petty thievery. They serve, alongside Javert, as one of the two arch-nemeses of the story's protagonist, Jean Valjean. While Javert represents the justice system that would punish Valjean, the Thénardiers represent the lawless subculture of society that would exploit him. The novel portrays them as shameless and abusive figures; some adaptations transform them into buffoonish characters, though sometimes still criminals, to provide comic relief from the generally more serious tone of the story. (wikipedia)
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This puzzle is 16 wide, which may be one of the reasons it felt slow despite having a transparently easy theme. But mostly it felt slow because the cluing kept being paralyzingly vague. Occasionally there were names I just didn't know (like IMRAN) or terms I didn't know (BALE grazing?), but it was the vagueness that really slowed me down. Stuff like 37A: Tool for PATSY or 34D: Invoice unit for ITEM or 14D: Bolsters for AIDS (I had ADDS and PADS before AIDS). That PATSY / ITEM / JOISTS sections was sluggish for me, which made MISS SCARLET sluggish as well (again, a very vague clue—in "Clue" alone there are six "characters" (not counting "Mr. Boddy"), and anyway "classic whodunit" suggests book, not board game). Thank god for OAKY, which got me traction in that section, finally (33D: Like some barrel-aged spirits). I had some difficulty elsewhere as well. Getting from ["Stop with that!"] to "C'MON!" wasn't easy, especially considering that "M" was in IMRAN (a total mystery name) (42D: ___ Khan, former Pakistani prime minister). Had some trouble parsing "I MESSED UP" (35D: "That's on me"), in part because I kept wondering if the speaker was maybe offering to pay for something rather than owning up to a mistake. There's a "San Francisco organization supporting women in the arts"? Is anyone outside S.F. supposed to know this? Bizarre. And when did COALS become an acceptable plural? The gag Christmas gift is COAL. Uncountable noun. No "S." You might refer to "lumps of coal," but never COALS. Never COALS. Well, maybe if you’re getting raked over the COALS. I think the COALS have to be hot to be plural. As clued, COALS is about as absurd a plural as DADAS, which ... Oh look, they cross. Fun.
[PATSY]
- 53D: Informal green lights (AOKS)— my apologies to AOKS for leaving it out of the "absolutely terrible plurals" discussion, above
- 35A: On ice longer than normal, say? (IN OT)— So ... this clue is so weird. In sports slang, if a game is "on ice," that means it's sewn up, won, over. But if the game is IN OT (in overtime), then obviously that's not the meaning that this clue is after. If the game in question is a championship game, perhaps there is champagne "on ice" back in the locker room waiting for the outcome ... but the champagne itself wouldn't be IN OT, so that makes no sense either. The only thing that makes sense is that the game in question is a hockey game, and so the players are literally "on ice" longer than they "normally" would be (in a regulation-length game). Or else it's something to do with the Old Testament and I am way, way off base.
- 43A: Students run for it (GYM CLASS) — oof, the syntax here. Students run inGYM CLASS, yes. "For" ... you need a lawyer to make "for" OK. I thought this was some kind of CLASS office, like CLASS president or CLASS treasurer. That's probably the misunderstanding the clue was meant to provoke.
- 8D: Eponymous youth sports organization, the largest of its kind in the U.S. (POP WARNER)— formally known as "POP WARNER Little Scholars"—like Little League, but for (American) football.
- 9D: Location within an office building: Abbr. (STE) — short for "suite"
- 47D: Not a straight shot (SLICE) — this is golf. A non-straight shot is either a "hook" or a SLICE
- 41D: N.B.A. player-turned-sports-analyst Rose (JALEN) — I was at Michigan when the Fab Five became famous, so JALEN was a gimme for me, but it seems like the kind of sports name that might flummox the (sizable) non-sportsy contingent of solvers.
- 52D: Gala throwaway (CORE) — this one got me. Following [Theater throwaway] (STUB), it really got me. I assumed "Gala" was a party, and while you might throw your ticket STUB away after leaving the theater, I could not imagine what you might throw away after leaving a gala. I had COR- and still no idea because the cross was also baffling me. I was staring at B-STS for 62A: Records and ... nothing. BUSTS? Criminal "records" are made up of BUSTS? LOL, no. "Records" here are "top performances or most remarkable events," i.e. BESTS. And the [Gala throwaway] is a CORE. Because "Gala" is a variety of apple. Clearly I need coffee. So I'll stop here.
P.S: the tenth annual edition of the NYT's Puzzle Mania comes out on December 1. If you're not a dead-tree newspaper subscriber, you can now pre-order a copy of the puzzle extravaganza for yourself (for $7 + shipping). This is the holiday supplement that has tons of different puzzles in it, including (in previous years) a truly giant crossword puzzle, which you have to put on a large table or the floor to solve. Anyway, it's an event. And now you know how to get it if you want it.