Constructor: John Westwig
Relative difficulty: Challenging
![]()
THEME:"Opposites Attract"— imaginary wacky phrases where the first word and the first part of the second word are "opposites":
Theme answers:
![]()
Gonna have to make this relatively brief, mostly because I found solving this to be a singularly miserable experience and I really don't want to dwell on it, or inflict my dwelling on it on all y'all. The theme is DOA. There's just nothing there at all. It's a ham-fisted wielding together of opposites into ... well, gibberish. None of it makes any sense, none of it is funny. IN OUTING? I don't even know what these phrases are trying to do. Do you call going to the club an "outing"? My wife: "An outing? That's a picnic." Indeed. A longing to be short (who? why?) is a SHORT LONGING? A longing for Martin Short would've been funnier, but "funny" does not seem to have been a sincere consideration. It's just goofiness all over, but not the big kind of ambitious goofiness that you need in a wall-to-wall wackiness type of theme. PRO CONNING? It's one exasperated sigh after another today. So there's that. Then there's the fact that the puzzle is also weirdly very hard in many places, partly because of a seemingly unending flurry of "?" clues, partly because of that giant white middle, which ended up being hard to get ahold of, and partly because of truly bizarre fill like OF A LIFETIME and MINGERA (I had to read the clue aloud and spell it out for my wife before I realized that it was hyphenated: MING-ERA, oof). Is a SAND GLASS just an hourglass, or something else? How (de) do you justify spelling the (already idiotic) HOW-DE-DO like that? (11A: Rural greeting). I spelled it out for my wife and when I got to that "E" she just made a face like "yikes" and I was like "I know, right?! That's the face *I* made!" I laughed out loud, but not in what I'd call a joyful way, at FBI SPY, what in the world? (56D: Certain government agent, informally) "Hi there, I'm a FBI SPY, a very real thing that is dangerous and sexy and not at all redundant or made-up, yes I am, yes sirree. And hey, have you met my friend here, Mr. CIA SPY? Also not made-up. But shh, we're deep undercover!" There are four "ON"s in this grid, but that's not nearly as gruesome as the two LABs! Two LABs, yeesh. Unless they are my neighbor's two chocolate labs, two labs = absurd. And one of them is LAB ANIMAL, which is just grim. Grim. Grim. That should've been the Word of the Day.
![]()
Relative difficulty: Challenging
Theme answers:
- IN OUTING (22A: Event at a hot new club?)
- SHORT LONGING (24A: "I wish I were under four feet tall," e.g.?)
- PRO CONNING (38A: Career for a scammer?)
- SPRING FALLING (67A: Slinky?)
- ODD EVENING (91A: Dinner date that makes a good story?)
- WHOLE PARTING (109A: A kiss, a hug, a wave, the works?)
- ON OFFING (112A: Title of an essay by a hit man?)
- EASY HARDING (37D: "Whoa there, Warren G.!"?)
- NICE MEANING (41D: Compliment for a lexicographer?)
Sir Brian Harold May CBE (born 19 July 1947) is an English musician, singer, songwriter and astrophysicist. He achieved worldwide fame as the lead guitarist of the rock band Queen, which he co-founded with singer Freddie Mercury and drummer Roger Taylor. His guitar work and songwriting contributions helped Queen become one of the most successful acts in music history. [...] May was appointed a Commander of the Most Excellent Order of the British Empire (CBE) in 2005 for services to the music industry and for charity work. May earned a PhD degree in astrophysics from Imperial College London in 2007, and was Chancellor of Liverpool John Moores University from 2008 to 2013. He was a "science team collaborator" with NASA's New Horizons Pluto mission. He is also a co-founder of the awareness campaign Asteroid Day. Asteroid 52665 Brianmay was named after him. May is also an animal rights activist, campaigning against fox hunting and the culling of badgers in the UK. May was knighted by King Charles III in the 2023 New Year Honours for services to music and charity. (wikipedia)
• • •
Maybe the idea was that the theme is obviously subpar and so the giant middle, with its hoard of long answers, was supposed to be some kind of value-added feature. Like "ok, sorry about the theme, but here's a fun feature!" And it's true that some of the best things about the grid are in there. SCREEN GRAB, very nice (32D: Still shot of a moving image, in tech-speak). NO MAN'S LAND, same (52D: Unclaimed area). SIREN SONG, sure, I'll take it (72A: Famous drawing of a ship?).
Not sure why seemingly every other clue needed a "?" on it. In addition to all the themers. I count ten (10) "?" clues, some of which are harmless (4D: End of a college search? (EDU)), some of which are kind of clever (81D: Stop hiding behind? (MOON)), and some of which are awful (98D: Good name for a political pundit? (ILENE)). The net effect was to make a hard puzzle harder, and an unpleasant experience ... longer. More drawn out. I just wanted it to end but the "?" clues were ganging up on me. MINGERA! LOL. I think my reading that as one word is actually the highlight of my solving experience today. When the puzzle doesn't give you pleasure, you can always rely on your own mistakes for a good laugh. Oh, my other favorite moment was when I assumed that Warren G. was the rapper. I mean, that's the rapper's name: Warren G. "On a mission trying to find Mr. Warren G." From the song "Regulate"? No? Not a '90s rap crowd? Sigh, OK. Anyway, I had EASY HARD- and was like "Uh ... EASY HARD RAP? EASY HARD RAP!? Wow, I know they can be tin-eared about hip-hop over there but that is Particularly bad." Again, the LOL is on me. It's not the rapper, it's everybody's favorite boring corrupt 1920s president, Warren G. HARDING! Someone should write a rap song about Teapot Dome. If They Might Be Giants can write a song about James K. Polk, surely someone can oblige me here re: Warren G.
SLOP ON ... I just keep staring at that truly horrid and impossible-to-imagine phrase? I had SLOP UP there at first, which was bad enough, but at least I could kind of understand the phrasing: you serve something up, and if what you serve up is slop ... SLOP UP? But SLOP ON, as clued, makes no sense. On what? The clue doesn't say. Your plate, I guess, but the clue and answer do not substitute neatly for one another in any context that I can imagine. Nevermind that, as I say, this is the first of four (!?) "ON"s in this grid (along with PUNTS ON, ON OFFING, and ON TOP). I gotta quit. I said I'd keep it short and that has not happened. I apologize. Talk amongst yourselves. I'll see you next time.
Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld
P.S. I'd like to thank The New Yorker for this amazing non-mention of me earlier this week, truly an honor to have my name omitted from your publication!
