Orphan girl in Byron's Don Juan / SUN 4-19-20 / Weapon sought by Voldemort / Disintegrate in a way as cells in the body / biblical figure with tomb in Cave of Patriarchs / Japanese soybean appetizer / Like Mona Lisa in 1911

Constructor: Jack Mowat and Jeff Chen

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium (9:18)

THEME:"Of Course!"— golf puns (bad-at-golf puns, I guess, to be quite specific, since the main "character" in each theme clue is a "duffer")

Theme answers:

• MICROCHIPS (23A: Duffer's approach shots that barely go anywhere?)
• A STROKE OF BAD LUCK (33A: Duffer's putt that just misses?)
• CAPTAIN HOOK (46A: Nickname for a duffer who can't hit straight?)
• DISTRACTED DRIVING (66A: Result of spectators heckling a duffer?)
• WEDGE ISSUES (88A: Duffer's problems with an angled club?)
• IRON DEFICIENCIES (100A: Duffer's reasons to choose a wood?)
• NOT UP TO PAR (115A: Like the duffer in this puzzle?)

Word of the Day: BOBSTAY (71A: Rope holding down a bowsprit) —

: a stay to hold a ship's bowsprit down 

bowsprit: 
: a large spar projecting forward from the stem of a ship  

spar:1

Take a field, area, topic of some kind. Write down a bunch of words from that area, topic, field that also have meanings outside of that area, topic, field. Find ordinary phrases containing those words. Congratulations, you are a Sunday NYTXW crossword constructor. Last week, coffee. Ooh, GROUNDS is a word from coffee but did you know also it has a different meaning!? Theme time! And today ... wow, DRIVING has a meaning in golf *and* in the automotive world! How far can I take this [six minutes later] wow, pretty far! In short, this theme was death. Well, no, I'd rather do this puzzle again than die, but only barely. This is the kind of puzzle you'd show someone who had never done a puzzle before to explain the concept of "theme"— that is, if you wanted to actively discourage that person from ever wanting to solve another puzzle ever again. "Oh ... yeah, yeah, I get it. I do. 'Cause 'chip' is a golf shot, so ... MICRO... CHIPS, yeah, it's cute. It is. OK, look, I gotta go, I'm late for this thing." End scene. Also, golf is the worst. But that's just opinion. Good opinion, but opinion. Whereas the tiresomeness of this theme type is not opinion. It is stone cold fact. This theme ARFED and you know it.


There's a smattering of likeable stuff in here. SCARJO! ELDERWAND! (I forgot this was a thing) SMURFETTE! SPEEDBAG! BAT SIGNAL! All of that is very nice. But I'm gonna need a lot (LOT) more of that to make up for IRON DEFICIENCIES and every other corny theme pun in this grid. Also, someone needs to come get BOBSTAY (??!) and LYSE (!?!?!?!) (76D: Disintegrate, in a way, as cells in the body) and whoever this LEILA is (62A: Orphan girl in Byron's "Don Juan"). Also, PLONKS?? (18D: Carelessly drops). Is that different from PLUNKS? Answer: it is not. Once again, I direct your attention to the concept of the *variant*!!!!

Not much else to say here, ALAS.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

[Follow Rex Parker on Twitter and Facebook]