Common landscaping tree with acorns / SUN 6-9-19 / Graham Oprah's longtime beau / Stinky Le Pew / Anastasia's love in Disney's Anastasia / Surgical removal procedure / Seattle-based insurance giant

Constructor: Seth A. Abel

Relative difficulty: Easy-Medium (9:41)

THEME:"Don't Quote Me"— Famous quotes that were never actually said, and the famous characters who didn't actually say them:

Theme answers:

• WICKED WITCH (58A) / "FLY, MY PRETTIES, FLY!" (23A: Line never said by 58-Across)
• CAPTAIN KIRK (83A) / "BEAM ME UP, SCOTTY!") (36A: Line never said by 83-Across)
• EARL OF GREYSTOKE (17D) / "ME TARZAN, YOU JANE!" (44D: Line never said by 17-Down)
• SERGEANT FRIDAY (99A) / "JUST THE FACTS, MA'AM" (121A: Line never said by 99-Across)

Word of the Day: TTY (122D: Communication syst. for the deaf) —

A teleprinter (teletypewriter, Teletype or TTY) is an electromechanicaldevice that can be used to send and receive typed messages through various communications channels, in both point-to-point and point-to-multipoint configurations. Initially they were used in telegraphy, which developed in the late 1830s and 1840s as the first use of electrical engineering. The machines were adapted to provide a user interface to early mainframe computers and minicomputers, sending typed data to the computer and printing the response. Some models could also be used to create punched tape for data storage (either from typed input or from data received from a remote source) and to read back such tape for local printing or transmission. [...] Teleprinters have largely been replaced by fully electronic computer terminals which typically have a computer monitor instead of a printer (though the term "TTY" is still occasionally used to refer to them, such as in Unix systems). Teleprinters are still widely used in the aviation industry (see AFTN and airline teletype system), and variations called Telecommunications Devices for the Deaf (TDDs) are used by the hearing impaired for typed communications over ordinary telephone lines. (wikipedia)

This was hard to watch. Not hard to do, but hard to watch unfold. Why hard? Well, the theme is actually interesting, in my opinion: a fortuitous coming together of concept and answer lengths (i.e. it's amazing that these non-quotes and their non-sayers can be arranged in a neat symmetrical fashion. There's probably a website somewhere that lists "famous quotes that never actually happened," and then the constructor fiddled around with names and quotes until he noticed that he could get symmetry to work out with these four (here's a list of such quotations that has two of today's examples on it) (there are dozens more). So it's a short, random list culled from a website list, but it's cute, and fun, and informative, and a good reminder that even in the internet age, with so much info at your tips, we all go around in various states of delusion and misapprehension all of the time. I enjoyed remembering (or misremebering) the quotes. Fine. No great shakes, but good enough, esp. on a Sunday. But ... wow, the fill on this one is extremely dreadful. Like, regular Dreadful looks at this grid and thinks "Hey, maybe I don't look so bad."


ABLUR AJAM AHUM. ITY TTY. Plural GEDS and SOYS and PSHAWS (!??). OPA! PINOAK (!?!?!?). SOIN! ROXANE IN A CAN!!!!! (actually, the ROXANE part of that is fine, I just wanted to say 'ROXANE IN A CAN'). I finished up this puzzle by doing the Downs along the bottom, roughly from west to east, and it was like being repeatedly punched, with the near-knockout / ragequit / "Uncle!" blow coming at MTST, which I am pronouncing muttsutt! I can't say I haven't seen muttsutt before, because I have, but it is So Bad. Like, a partial *and* an abbr. combining for exponential terribleness growth. All over, everywhere you turn, this thing is ugly in the fill department. IDIGIT / STOPSIT / ATEITUP ...  seriously though, stop "IT."


The puzzle has a couple more big problems on its hands, both of which are causing distraction / annoyance / consternation among solvers, and both of which could've been easily avoided. Let's start with the clue on DIMITRI (18D: Anastasia's love in Disney's "Anastasia"). You might have no idea there's anything problematic or controversial about that clue, but if so, then you are not half the animation nerd that many early solvers of this puzzle appear to be:





It was not a Disney release, but Disney owns it now. The clue is defensible only in a strictly legal sense. When "Anastasia" became a big deal, i.e when it was released, it was decidedly not Disney. You wanna know how this confusion could've been avoided? It's pretty complicated, but try to follow along: drop "Disney" from the clue. The. End. Or just call it "the 1997 animated film 'Anastasia'." No need to bring Disney in and muck up the timeline and get people confused and riled etc. Unless Disney's paying you for product placement, in which case, knock yourselves out, I guess. The next avoidable problem, more serious, and slightly (but not much) harder to work around, is Why Is A Disgraced, Child Sexual Abuse-Enabling Football Coach In My Grid!?!?

PATERNO, yuck (94D: Former Penn State football coach). No. They took down his damn statue on the Penn State campus, you'd think the least the crossword could do is put his name on the No Fly list (the No Fill list?). Here is Washington Post editor Evan Birnholz's quick workaround in that corner:

Got rid of NOES and MRAZ and DEJA too, so it's better in every way. Amazing what a little elbow grease can do when you actually care about the quality and overall vibe of your puzzle product. Okay, I'm done for today. TTY Later.

Signed, Rex Parker, King of CrossWorld

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